Quarterlife Girl...

31 Days to Clean - Day 1

2011-06-01T21:04:00.000-05:00

I started the 31 Days to Clean ebook today. I'm not crazy enough to think that I will be able to blog about the journey every day this month, but I wanted to share my first assignment. I was to write down exactly why I want a clean home. Here it is. I want my home to be clean because I want it to be:

Today's assignment was easy. Tomorrow I have to wipe down the refrigerator and freezer. Ugh! I mean, Yeah!

Recycling BLACK LATINA

2011-05-31T20:01:00.000-05:00

I wrote this article in college and it was published in Hispanic Magazine in 1999--before blogs, before Facebook, before Twitter. Even still, it was widely circulated online, cited in several research papers and was even reprinted in a sociology textbook reader. I found it on someone's website today and thought I'd share and preserve it on my blog.

Black Latina

By Delina D. Pryce

I always thought of former major-league baseball player Ruben Sierra as the sexiest man in the world. His dark, chocolaty skin, spicy Puerto Rican accent, and cocky attitude--together with his home runs and $6 million contract--always made for an enjoyable day at the ballpark.

But during my monologue of praise, nothing dampened my mood quicker than hearing, "Ruben's not black; he's Puerto Rican." It was a grim reminder of the ignorance that I've had to deal with ever since I was old enough to fully understand the truth.

If I received a dollar for every time I heard " You're not black you're Hispanic" or "You're not Hispanic your black." I'd be well on my way to equaling Ruben's small fortune. To a lot of people, and to the majority of the people I've met, "black" and "Latino" are mutually exclusive terms.

Reality couldn't be further from the truth.

Many people don't realize that slave ships dropped Africans off not only in the United States but also in the Caribbean, Mexico, Central America, and South America. Blacks in this country share a common history with those in the Caribbean and Latin America. Yet, because historical circumstances have created a variety of cultures within the black community in the Americas, people, including blacks themselves, are quick to make distinctions.

It saddens me that those with an obviously African ancestry refuse to acknowledge it, clinging instead to a lone term, "Hispanic" or "Latino".

Being labeled "black" in the United States carries a heavy burden of stereotypes that many black Latinos would rather not deal with. In my view, if you're being followed in a store or beaten by the police, it doesn't really matter what you check on a census form. To a racist you're still a nigger.

Because I was born in Costa Rica, people want me to choose. "What are you?" they ask. When I was growing up, sometimes I'd check "Hispanic" sometimes I'd check "black" sometimes I'd check both. Administrators at my school I was told, didn't like that. It made their statistics a little less scientific.

I was born in Costa Rica, moved to Mexico when I was two years old, and have been living in Texas for almost fourteen years. Yes, my upbringing was unlike most of my black friends in the States. Still, I am more like them than I'm like my Hispanic friends from various countries. We listen to the same music, enjoy the same churches, use the same hair stylists, and experience the same strain of racism. In a lot of ways it's easier for my black friends to comprehend that there is an African Diaspora. They see the fact that I speak Spanish as an asset ("Can you help me with my Spanish homework?"). If anything has been harder for me to explain to them, it's that I'm not "mixed with Hispanic."

On the other hand, my Latino friends see my race as a liability. "You're not black, like the African Americans in the United States," one told me recently. It bothers me that to accept me they want to distance me from being black, which carries negative connotations in the Americas. Some even have the audacity to tell me why they despise "those black people."

They even wait for me to agree.

In Peru, blacks are still being used as ornamental images--chauffeurs, pallbearers, valets, and servants. In Brazil, blacks are considered marginal members of society. In countless other Latin American countries, blacks are shut out of government and positions of power. Television shows, news programs, and beauty magazines omit dark faces. The denial of racial diversity in the media, government and business is much like what the United States faced 30 years ago. "We are looking for ways to improve our self-esteem because the society conveys to blacks that we are nothing We want to let people know that we are not only there to cook and play football "[soccer]" said Piedad Cordoba de Castro, the first black woman to become senator in Colombia, in a 1995 Dallas Morning News article.

This is why I think it is foolish for black Latinos to overlook their blackness and believe they are Hispanic like their countrymen of European ancestry." The effort to build a black consciousness movement in Latin America has been hobbled by the low level of racial identification among blacks," Cordoba de Castro said. A hierarchy exists within Latin American countries. Those of European ancestry are at the top and those of African heritage are at the bottom, one notch below indigenous people. Those of mixed race-mestizos (indigenous and Caucasian) and mulattos (indigenous and Negroid)--fall some where in between. Many blacks are eager to point out their Indian blood thus elevating themselves above black.

I realize the inaccuracy and silliness of racial and ethnic categories in this day and age. Contrary to neo-Nazi belief, no one is really any one thing anymore. What still remains, inequality and power, all over the world, is defined and determined in racial terms. For this reason, racial identification should be used to unite and struggle together for equality.

The stupidity of useless racial identification stems from the ignorance of racism. Black Latinos, who don't identify themselves as such, try to be exceptions to the rules and stereotypes that govern blacks. But racists don't care if you're bilingual and international. The very nature of prejudice does not allow for exceptions; it looks at group traits, not at individuals. Racism is prejudice combined with power. Until black Hispanics believe this, they will continue to be happily oppressed, and not even realize it (and even deny it).

It's time to know and celebrate who you really are. I know black culture in Costa Rica. I know black culture in the United States. I also know they both stem from the same place. Being Latina and black are not mutually exclusive, but mutually complementary. Being black and Latina has influenced and shaped my views, my thoughts, my experiences--who I am.

Never would I deny either because they're both me. And I like me.

Why don't others agree?

Copyright (c) 1999 HISPANIC Magazine. All rights reserved.

"I will give you rest." - Jesus

2011-04-09T01:43:00.000-05:00

When I was studying the life of Moses, I was struck how God would give Israel a real, tangible *thing* and then in the New Testament, hundreds of years later, Jesus was that *thing* in a spiritual sense.

Here are some examples:

Old Testament shadow	Jesus reality
The Passover lamb- Exodus 12:43-50 (*verse 46)	John 19:33, 36 Jesus, the lamb of God - John 1:29
The Rock -- Exodus 33:12-23 (this one blew my mind...to see how we hide in Jesus, the Rock, to get a glimpse of God's glory).	Psalm 19:14 - describes the Lord as our rock and our redeemer
Water from the Rock- Exodus 17	Jesus - 1 Corinthians 10:1-5 - John 4:10-15
The Manna (bread from heaven)- Exodus 16	Jesus is the "true bread from heaven" - John 6:31, 32

Finally, one life-changing day when a friend encouraged me to read Colossians 2:16-17 and Hebrews 3 and 4. I finally *got* that the very real Sabbath was realized in the person of Jesus.

I was free to stop working to be counted as righteous before the Father.
I could stop working to prove my loyalty to the Creator.
I could rest in Him and His finished work at the cross.

It's something that I haven't been able to articulate to many people so they get it. The other day I was reading John 6:48 and I wondered, if it was written like this (see below), would my sabbatarian friends get what it means that Jesus is our rest? But first, let's read the real passage and context:

John 6 (you've gotta read all this or you won't even get what I'm talking about)

²⁶ Jesus replied, “I tell you the truth, you want to be with me because I fed you, not because you understood the miraculous signs. ²⁷ But don’t be so concerned about perishable things like food. Spend your energy seeking the eternal life that the Son of Man can give you. For God the Father has given me the seal of his approval.”
²⁸ They replied, “We want to perform God’s works, too. What should we do?”
²⁹ Jesus told them, “This is the only work God wants from you: Believe in the one he has sent.”
³⁰ They answered, “Show us a miraculous sign if you want us to believe in you. What can you do? ³¹ After all, our ancestors ate manna while they journeyed through the wilderness! The Scriptures say, ‘Moses gave them bread from heaven to eat.'”
³² Jesus said, “I tell you the truth, Moses didn’t give you bread from heaven. My Father did. And now he offers you the true bread from heaven. ³³ The true bread of God is the one who comes down from heaven and gives life to the world.”
³⁴ “Sir,” they said, “give us that bread every day.”
³⁵ Jesus replied, “I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never be hungry again. Whoever believes in me will never be thirsty. ³⁶ But you haven’t believed in me even though you have seen me. ³⁷ However, those the Father has given me will come to me, and I will never reject them. ³⁸ For I have come down from heaven to do the will of God who sent me, not to do my own will. ³⁹ And this is the will of God, that I should not lose even one of all those he has given me, but that I should raise them up at the last day. ⁴⁰ For it is my Father’s will that all who see his Son and believe in him should have eternal life. I will raise them up at the last day.”
⁴¹ Then the people began to murmur in disagreement because he had said, “I am the bread that came down from heaven.” ⁴² They said, “Isn’t this Jesus, the son of Joseph? We know his father and mother. How can he say, ‘I came down from heaven’?”
⁴³ But Jesus replied, “Stop complaining about what I said. ⁴⁴ For no one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws them to me, and at the last day I will raise them up. ⁴⁵ As it is written in the Scriptures,^[i] ‘They will all be taught by God.’ Everyone who listens to the Father and learns from him comes to me. ⁴⁶ (Not that anyone has ever seen the Father; only I, who was sent from God, have seen him.)
⁴⁷ “I tell you the truth, anyone who believes has eternal life. ⁴⁸ Yes, I am the bread of life! ⁴⁹ Your ancestors ate manna in the wilderness, but they all died. ⁵⁰ Anyone who eats the bread from heaven, however, will never die. ⁵¹ I am the living bread that came down from heaven. Anyone who eats this bread will live forever; and this bread, which I will offer so the world may live, is my flesh.”
⁵² Then the people began arguing with each other about what he meant. “How can this man give us his flesh to eat?” they asked.
⁵³ So Jesus said again, “I tell you the truth, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you cannot have eternal life within you. ⁵⁴But anyone who eats my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise that person at the last day. ⁵⁵ For my flesh is true food, and my blood is true drink. ⁵⁶ Anyone who eats my flesh and drinks my blood remains in me, and I in him. ⁵⁷ I live because of the living Father who sent me; in the same way, anyone who feeds on me will live because of me. ⁵⁸ I am the true bread that came down from heaven. Anyone who eats this bread will not die as your ancestors did (even though they ate the manna) but will live forever.”

Here's my adaptation of verses 48-51 (with Jesus' words from Matthew 11:28-30):

"Yes, I am the Sabbath-rest. Your ancestors kept the 7th day but they never stopped working under the law. Anyone who comes to me, will find rest for their souls. I am the Sabbath-rest. Anyone who is weary and carries heavy burdens may find rest in me. For my yoke is easy to bear and the burden I give you is light."

I guess this is the same confusion and dilemma when we Former Adventist try to explain the Jesus reality of Sabbath. You can almost hear the crowd saying, “How can this man give us rest?”

"And besides...we LOOOOOOOVE Sabbath," they say.

No SDA will ever admit that the Sabbath is part of her salvation package. They love it. They see it as something they want to do.It's a much needed-respite from a hectic week. It's unthinkable to give it up. It's unthinkable to even want to give it up ("Yeah, yeah, spiritual rest, Jesus, what I need is my day off! Keep your "bread from heaven," Jesus, we're huuuuuuungry!")

Plus, it's part of God's immutable law, isn't it?

Plus, what about the Sunday Laws?!!?!

And the persecution of Sabbath-keepers in the end times?!

As a born and raised SDA, I can honestly say that Sabbath-keeping is part love of fellowship and disconnecting and part fear. So you work hard to make sure the Sabbath is a delight and all conversations and activities are pleasing in His sight.

But how can a soul find rest when it's working (obligatorily resting) under the fear of condemnation?

How can a soul find rest when it's busy "guarding the edges of the Sabbath," convinced that this is how you're supposed to "work out your own salvation with fear and trembling?"

Jesus said then, and TODAY he says: “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.” (Matthew 11:28-30)

I've come to realize that phrases like "Jesus is our Sabbath rest" don't mean a hill of beans to my Adventist friends. "What about the Sabbath?" is the number one asked question when people learn about our story of leaving Adventism. I try to explain as succinctly as possible, but I sense that people don't leave with their questions answered, with any satisfaction that they just had a light-bulb moment.

Sometimes I wonder. Can you understand what it means to rest in Jesus, before you rest in Jesus? Or is it one of those things you do out of obedience, in faith, and then you grasp the reality?

My sincere prayer is that anyone who reads this will find rest in Him. Soften their hearts Lord, in order to discover the beauty, the sanctity, the reality of rest in You. Amen.

Jesus is our example?

2011-02-17T20:53:00.004-06:00

After you say to an Adventist, "Jesus was a Jew, that's why He kept the Sabbath," nine times out of ten they'll reply, "Jesus is our example." They say that to prove that we're supposed to keep the law...but not the whole law, just the 10 commandments, emphasis on the 4th ("as was His custom").

I did a search and the only verse in the Bible that talks about Jesus being our example is 1 Peter 2:21-25.
It begins, "For God called you to do good, even if it means suffering, just as Christ suffered for you. He is your example, and you must follow his steps."

It continues.
"He never sinned,
      nor ever deceived anyone.
²³ He did not retaliate when he was insulted,
      nor threaten revenge when he suffered.
   He left his case in the hands of God,
      who always judges fairly.
²⁴ He personally carried our sins
      in his body on the cross
   so that we can be dead to sin
      and live for what is right.
   By his wounds
      you are healed.
²⁵ Once you were like sheep
      who wandered away.
   But now you have turned to your Shepherd,
      the Guardian of your souls."

This says nothing about keeping the law. There's no hint of the law in this passage.
But I did take something valuable out of studying this. Even though I may "suffer" (through insults, personal attacks and strained relationships) for the things I say here and elsewhere as I push back against mis-characterizations of what the Bible says, I will continue to do good and allow Jesus to be my example by not retaliating when I'm insulted or threatening revenge.

The truth is, because He is God, He kept the law perfectly. He is perfect.
The truth is, His perfection is the reason why He was a worthy sacrifice (the spotless lamb that the law required) to atone for our sins and redeem us. He could not have sinned. He could not have broken the law. He was God -- the Spirit of God, wrapped in a human body. If, through His Spirit, we are empowered to keep the law perfectly, why not just send the Spirit and skip the bloody Cross?!

In Deuteronomy it says: "For we will be counted as righteous when we obey all the commands the Lord our God has given us," and Romans 10:5 says "For Moses writes that the law’s way of making a person right with God requires obedience to all of its commands."

But no one ever got it right, it just made them realize their need for a Savior!

Christ died to make us right with God.

Galatians 2:16-21 says:

Yet we know that a person is made right with God by faith in Jesus Christ, not by obeying the law. And we have believed in Christ Jesus, so that we might be made right with God because of our faith in Christ, not because we have obeyed the law. For no one will ever be made right with God by obeying the law.”
¹⁷ But suppose we seek to be made right with God through faith in Christ and then we are found guilty because we have abandoned the law. Would that mean Christ has led us into sin? Absolutely not! ¹⁸ Rather, I am a sinner if I rebuild the old system of law I already tore down. ¹⁹ For when I tried to keep the law, it condemned me. So I died to the law—I stopped trying to meet all its requirements—so that I might live for God. ²⁰ My old self has been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me. So I live in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. ²¹ I do not treat the grace of God as meaningless. For if keeping the law could make us right with God, then there was no need for Christ to die.

I was going to write something about the notion that the Holy Spirit is given to empower us to keep the law. If anyone has a text to back that up, please share. In the meantime, I think the above text addresses that as well. The contrast is living under the law vs. living by the Spirit (See 2 Corinthians 3 and Hebrews and Romans and Galatians and Ephesians).

If you think that the Spirit motivates you to keep the Mosaic law, please comment below and tell me when was the last time the Spirit asked you to attach gold bells to the hem of your clothing (Exodus 28:33).

If you think that the law is separated into moral and ceremonial (the 10C being moral), please explain to me how the the texts below (not found in the 10C) are ceremonial.

Exodus 22:21 - "You must not mistreat or oppress foreigners in any way."

Leviticus 19:16 - "Do not spread slanderous gossip among your people."

Deuteronomy 24:14 - "Never take advantage of poor or destitute laborers, whether they are fellow Israelites or foreigners living in your towns."

"But when you are directed by the Spirit, you are not under obligation to the law of Moses," Galatians 5:18.

If you think that living by the Spirit and doing away with the law, saying that it's obsolete, gone away, done away with and nailed to the Cross means that it's okay for born-again believers to steal, kill and commit adultery, then you need to check your definition of Spirit. Clearly, we're talking about two different spirits. Keep reading in Galatians 5 if you want to see what it looks like to walk in the Spirit.

When you see Jesus as merely your example, you reduce Him down to be the self-help guru. Emphasis on this overshadows His purpose and His plan to be our sacrificial Lamb, our sinless, spotless sacrifice, whose sacrifice on the Cross saved those who believe and cleansed our sins (past, present AND future), once and for all. (That's the Gospel, by the way.)

You've got to sit down, study this stuff, recognize the assumptions you're making and weigh those assumptions with the TRUTH found in the Word.

Question:
What does the Bible mean when it calls Jesus our example?

Just ask!

2011-02-13T13:22:00.000-06:00

Since leaving Adventism, I've found a strange silence and awkward moments with friends and family. It seems like people don't know how to act or whether they are free to ask questions. Nobody wants to bring up the touchy subject of religion. Others have heard strange rumors or made stranger assumptions about why we left and what our beliefs are now.

It's all totally unnecessary awkwardness and confusion. If you have a question, if you're wondering "what happened!?" Just ask! If you're wondering if we go to church or if we keep Sabbath or if we still believe in God (yes, some have wondered), just ask!

Seriously. There's nothing awry here. There's no juicy story. We have nothing to hide or anything to be ashamed of. We welcome your questions. No need to assume things or feel shy about asking. Accept this as an open invitation to JUST ASK.

Oh and one more thing. You don't have to ask "publicly" (on this blog or on Facebook). You can send us an email or text or tweet or even drop by (just call first so I can straighten up a little).

Help my friend bring her son home

2011-01-17T07:19:00.000-06:00

I met Sandra through a blog I used to be involved with for young pastor's wives. She's a pastor's wife and she blogs all over the Internet. We've stayed in touch since that first time I interviewed her and like to exchange thoughts on books we're reading and life in general. The woman is smart and funny, a great writer and a godly wife and mother. What has moved me the most though, is her commitment to brining her son, a son she's never met, home. Her family is adopting a toddler from Ethiopia. They've been fundraising for some months and this BUSY stay-at-home mom has even taken on a part-time job in retail for the extra cash it will add to the adoption fund. It's awesome to see how much they love their son already and how much he's already part of their family. I asked Sondra to share some of their journey to adoption, but if you want to skip that, and just donate ANYTHING...even $5 will help, click here.

Tell us your journey to adoption. When and why did you decide to adopt?
My husband Lee and I talked about adoption before we were even married. Our plan was to "have a couple kids, adopt a couple kids." We were married in 2003, had our first son in 2005 and our second son in 2007. At the end of 2009 we were trying to get pregnant again. It took longer than it had ever taken before. We talked and prayed about what to do. In early 2010 we were watching the TV show "The Office" where Pam had her baby. Lee looked at me and asked, "Are you ready for all that again?" and I surprised him by saying, "No." He asked if I was ready to look into the adoption process and I said yes! It's a funny way to officially start, but it's true!

Why did you pursue an international (vs. domestic) adoption and why Ethiopia?
Our #1 reason for wanting to adopt internationally was exposure to the gospel. To think that there are children out there who will likely die without hearing about Christ broke (and continues to break) our hearts. The more we researched other countries, the more we were drawn to Ethiopia. We read stats like these: there are more than 5 million orphans in Ethiopia and one-tenth of Ethiopian orphans will die before their first birthday, one-sixth will die before their 5th birthday. Even if they survive, education and medical care are not up to the standards they are for children in the foster care system in the US.

What do you know about your new son already? When do you expect to bring him home?

The Peoples Family (-1)

We know nothing about our child specifically at this time. We are able to ask for certain parameters- like he will be between 12 months and 36 months old (our agency only places children into forever families if the child is at least 10 months younger than their youngest child, this isn't true of all agencies). We have chosen the name "Joel" for him to help us picture him in our minds and be able to pray specifically for him. We are currently finishing up our dossier (lots of paper work!) and hope to be on the wait list in the next few months. The expected wait time (currently for our specific agency) is 9-12 months for a toddler boy. When our number is up on the wait list, they will send us pictures and information about a child who needs a family. We can choose him or wait for another child. We are praying for a referral by next Christmas!

What are some God-things you've learned/experienced in this process?
Hmmm... where to start? First, that God is truly a Father to the fatherless (Psalm 68:5). He sees my son right now even though he's half a world away. He loves Joel more than I can comprehend and is preparing him for us as He prepares us for him. I've also learned God is not a dead-beat dad. He will provide. When we were accepted into the adoption program there was a stipulation--we had to raise $15,000 in 90 days. My husband is a pastor and I'm a stay-at-home mom. We didn't have $15,000. Some people may have seen that as a closed door. We saw it as an opportunity for God to show His power. About 60 days into our fundraising, our agency called again and said social services had changed their minds and we only had to have $7,000! God had already supplied that amount! I do want to point out that during that time we prayed for faith like Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-Nego--they told the king that God was able to save them, but even if He didn't, they would still worship Him (Daniel 3:17-18).

What advice/encouragement would you give to someone who'd like to begin the process?
My advice is to obey God. He calls us all to care for widows and orphans. How we do that may be different, but we should all be doing it. I believe many more Christians should be adopting. I believe Christians who aren't adopting should be supporting those who are. There are reportedly 146 million orphans in our world. We can all do something to help! I hope our story shows that you don't already have to have thousands in the bank to start the process. Just be faithful!

Got $20 to spare? Can you skip buying your latte for a couple of days and donate the cash to their adoption fund? I ENCOURAGE you to just do it. Just click, give and pray for Joel to come home to his family soon.

Daddy's coming!

2010-10-26T22:34:00.000-05:00

Ben always calls from wherever he is to say he's on his way home. One day, when our son was a baby, I said to him, "Daddy's coming! Daddy's coming!" And it struck me, that that is how I feel about Jesus' soon return. Expectant. Excited. Relieved. At ease. Safe.

But it wasn't always this way.

Growing up Adventist the feeling was more like the proverbial warning, "Just WAIT 'til your father gets here!" or the rush to "hurry up and clean up! Daddy is on his way!"

The song (by the Heralds) was a solemn warning, not a jubilant hymn of praise and expectation.

"The Lord is coming, are you ready?
The Lord is coming, are you ready?
Would your heart be right, if He came tonight?
The Lord is coming, are you ready?"

So here I am, growing up, observing people. Picture with me the holiest lady in church. She opens her mouth and she's usually saying something about "if" when she talks about her salvation. "If I remain faithful," "If the Lord is willing," "If I don't stay close to Him, I may not make it up there."

My thoughts: "If this lady who has lived 80 years going to church every time the church doors open, eating vegan, handing out tracts at the bus stop, living an above-and-beyond pious, humble, unenviable life, is still wondering, at age 89, if she will be fit for heaven, then I will never make it. Cause I ain't her and I will never be her."

I was assured that you didn't have to be "like that" to make it to heaven, but yet her answer to "The Lord is coming, are you ready," is still, "I don't know." If she can't know, how could I ever know?

But now I know. Am I ready? Heck yeah!
Are you kidding me? Ready to see my Savior face to face? To worship Him LIVE? To be in awe of Him? To see who I've been talking to all this time? To thank Him for ordering my life so that I could be the wife of Ben McPhaull and the mother of Maxton, Maxwelle and Maxine? Are you kidding me? Yeah, I'm ready! (And it's not because I think I'm good enough, btw).

That day fills me with hope and if I don't live to see it, I'll get to be in His presence even sooner! (Philippians 1)

But back to the "Are you ready?" message. Even though Adventists will NEVER admit that they preach salvation by works, the whole concept of "Are you ready?" denotes exactly that. (It begs the question, "What do I need to do to be ready?") This approach is often used by SDA evangelists to induce feelings of inadequacy in their members and even in Christians who may be attending their meetings. (This question is irrelevant to the unchurched, un-Christian who neither knows Jesus nor cares if He's coming, much less if he is ready.)

If you ask an SDA what it takes to "be ready," you'll probably hear some variation of "Accept Jesus as your Savior and keep the 10 commandments (including the 4th). If you sin (defined as not keeping the 10 commandments) you must ask for forgiveness."

The Bible says (emphases mine):

“I tell you the truth, those who listen to my message and believe in God who sent me HAVE eternal life. They will NEVER be condemned for their sins, but they have ALREADY passed from death into life." - John 5:24

³⁵ Jesus replied, “I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never be hungry again. Whoever believes in me will never be thirsty. ³⁶ But you haven’t believed in me even though you have seen me. ³⁷ However, those the Father has given me will come to me, and I will NEVER reject them. ³⁸ For I have come down from heaven to do the will of God who sent me, not to do my own will. ³⁹ And this is the will of God, that I should NOT LOSE even one of all those he has given me, but that I should raise them up at the last day. ⁴⁰ For it is my Father’s will that all who see his Son and BELIEVE IN HIM should have eternal life. I will raise them up at the last day.” - John 6:35-40.

⁸ God SAVED YOU by his grace WHEN YOU BELIEVED. And you can’t take credit for this; it is a gift from God. ⁹ Salvation is NOT A REWARD for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it. - Ephesians 2:8,9

²¹ But now God has shown us a way to be made right with him without keeping the requirements of the law, as was promised in the writings of Moses and the prophets long ago. ²² We are MADE RIGHT WITH GOD BY PLACING OUR FAITH IN JESUS CHRIST. And this is true for everyone who believes, no matter who we are.
²³ For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard. ²⁴ Yet God, with undeserved kindness, DECLARES THAT WE ARE RIGHTEOUS. He did this through Christ Jesus when he freed us from the penalty for our sins. ²⁵ For God presented Jesus as the sacrifice for sin. PEOPLE ARE MADE RIGHT WITH GOD WHEN THEY BELIEVE that Jesus sacrificed his life, shedding his blood. This sacrifice shows that God was being fair when he held back and did not punish those who sinned in times past, ²⁶ for he was looking ahead and including them in what he would do in this present time. God did this to demonstrate his righteousness, for he himself is fair and just, and HE DECLARES SINNERS TO BE RIGHT IN HIS SIGHT WHEN THEY BELIEVE IN JESUS. -Romans 3:21-26

Therefore, there is now NO CONDEMNATION FOR THOSE WHO ARE IN CHRIST JESUS, ²because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death. - Romans 8:1,2

I have friends who think the Investigative Judgment is some theological concept debated by theologians and pastors. It's way over their heads, out of their realm of interest and above their pay grade. Believing it has no implications in their everyday spiritual lives, they dismiss any challenges to it, yet keep believing it. This whole post is a living-color example of how this belief plays out in every day life. And I didn't make it up all in my head. To be fair, no SDA would deny the texts above, yet they simultaneously believe and internalize what Ellen G. White wrote in the Great Controversy. She spells it all out. Check it. (emphases mine)

Every man's work passes in review before God and is registered for faithfulness or unfaithfulness. Opposite each name in the books of heaven is entered with terrible exactness every wrong word, every selfish act, every unfulfilled duty, and every secret sin, with every artful dissembling. Heaven-sent warnings or reproofs neglected, wasted moments, unimproved opportunities, the influence exerted for good or for evil, with its far-reaching results, all are chronicled by the recording angel.
The law of God is the standard by which the characters and the lives of men will be tested in the judgment.
Those who in the judgment are "accounted worthy" will have a part in the resurrection of the just.
As the books of record are opened in the judgment, the lives of all who have believed on Jesus come in review before God. Beginning with those who first lived upon the earth, our Advocate presents the cases of each successive generation, and closes with the living. Every name is mentioned, every case closely investigated. Names are accepted, names rejected. When any have sins remaining upon the books of record, unrepented of and unforgiven, their names will be blotted out of the book of life, and the record of their good deeds will be erased from the book of God's remembrance.
All who have truly repented of sin, and by faith claimed the blood of Christ as their atoning sacrifice, have had pardon entered against their names in the books of heaven; as they have become partakers of the righteousness of Christ, and their characters are found to be in harmony with the law of God, their sins will be blotted out, and they themselves will be accounted worthy of eternal life.
Sins that have not been repented of and forsaken will not be pardoned and blotted out of the books of record, but will stand to witness against the sinner in the day of God. He may have committed his evil deeds in the light of day or in the darkness of night; but they were open and manifest before Him with whom we have to do. Angels of God witnessed each sin and registered it in the unerring records. Sin may be concealed, denied, covered up from father, mother, wife, children, and associates; no one but the guilty actors may cherish the least suspicion of the wrong; but it is laid bare before the intelligences of heaven. The darkness of the darkest night, the secrecy of all deceptive arts, is not sufficient to veil one thought from the knowledge of the Eternal. God has an exact record of every unjust account and every unfair dealing. He is not deceived by appearances of piety. He makes no mistakes in His estimation of character. Men may be deceived by those who are corrupt in heart, but God pierces all disguises and reads the inner life.
How solemn is the thought! Day after day, passing into eternity, bears its burden of records for the books of heaven. Words once spoken, deeds once done, can never be recalled. Angels have registered both the good and the evil. The mightiest conqueror upon the earth cannot call back the record of even a single day. Our acts, our words, even our most secret motives, all have their weight in deciding our destiny for weal or woe. Though they may be forgotten by us, they will bear their testimony to justify or condemn.(All quotes taken from Great Controversy chapter titled, "Facing Life's Record.")

It's no wonder the senile old lady wasn't sure if she was going to make it! What if she forgot to confess one sin?

Do you sometimes wonder if you WILL be saved?
Do you ever think about what else you need to change or improve in order to be ready?

or

Are you secure that you're good enough and "safe to save."

Neither of these positions is biblical.

When you accept Jesus as your Savior, it's a done deal. You can KNOW you are saved. There's no UNDO button. His blood covers ALL of your sins, past, present and future, not just the ones for which you remembered to ask forgiveness.

None of your righteous deeds can add to what Jesus did on the Cross or better secure or insure your salvation. It's all Jesus. He calls. He draws. He saves. He keeps. He comes back. He gets the glory.

Believe it. Are you ready?

I'm a Christ-follower who attends a Baptist church

2010-09-03T19:00:00.000-05:00

It's been almost 2 months since we attended our the New Member class at our new church. It's a Baptist church. To become members, we didn't have to raise our right hand and take a vow. We didn't have to sign anything saying that we're now Baptists. And we don't even have to get baptized again (unless we choose to be).

If you're SDA, it's probably hard to understand that you can be "just a Christian" and attend any Christian church. Other denominations don't require you to take an oath that you believe in their distinctives in order to become a member or be baptized.

There are several reasons why we decided on our particular church, and I'll blog about those specifics at another time. But the main thing we love about our church is the exegetical, verse-by-verse preaching of the Bible. And that's a major reason why we are where we are.

Adventist evangelist, Mark Finley, teaches that Adventism takes the "gems of truth" from all denominations and puts it in one denomination, SDA. No matter what you think about Mark Finley, or traditional SDA evangelism, this is something that most SDAs believe.

As an Adventist, it boggled my mind how my best friend's mother, who grew up Episcopalian, ended up raising Caroline in a Baptist church. One day I asked how they ended up being members of that church for 20+ years. Her answer? "Because it was right down the street." Back then, I didn't understand how you could switch denominations like that. I thought every denomination was as different from each other as Adventism is from, say, Baptists. It was unthinkable to choose membership in a different denomination's church on the basis of proximity.

So, after Ben resigned from his position as a Seventh-day Adventist pastor and we left the Adventist church, we set out on the quest to join a local church. But we didn't get on a quest to examine every denomination's version of the 28 Fundamental Beliefs (as if every denomination had one).

We realized that we could be could be simply, "Christian" and worship at a Christian church, regardless of denomination. We could be part of the capital C church--the Body of Christ. Though previously we thought that as Adventists we held the basic beliefs of Christianity in common with other denominations, the more we studied, the more we realized that the gospel preached and proclaimed by the Adventist church is another gospel. The worldview of an Adventist is not a biblical worldview. Plain and simple.

Among the core, foundational beliefs that are central to Christianity and not found in Adventism:

the Bible is the inspired, infallible, authoratative and inerrant Word of God and is the final authority of matters of faith and practice.
Salvation comes through Christ alone (the receiving and the keeping of it)
Jesus' atoning sacrifice on the cross was complete and enough to save us and keep us saved

Evangelical Christian churches (regardless of denomination) believe in these tenets. It's why, as Christ-followers, we have the freedom to attend any of these Bible-preaching churches, whether it's a Baptist, Evangelical Free, Presbyterian, Bible or non-denominational church. As an Adventist, I totally didn't get this.

The differences in denominations (and even within denominations) are of secondary importance. Things like eschatology, predestination and free will. It's not over issues that divide "the Body." To join a church, you don't have to agree with everything. My friend, Colleen Tinker (editor of Proclamation magazine) explains it this way: "As long as the church holds to an orthodox statement of faith: the Trinity, the centrality of the cross, and the inerrancy and necessity of Scripture as the source of teaching and spiritual growth. If those are there, we can have fellowship, and we can learn to live by the Spirit as we rub shoulders [with those with whom we disagree with on the secondary issues]."

There is belief propagated in Adventism that all of these different denominations are claiming to be the "one true church" or that they are all in competition with each other. The reality is that these different Christian denominations consider each other to all be part of the body of Christ and consider it their shared mission to share the Gospel with the world, love and serve.

As a matter of fact, when we first arrived to Texas, we visited a Bible Church. The pastors and their wives and the members were extremely welcoming and gracious and hospitable. We enjoyed the service and the people we met. Everything was right, except we preferred to be in a church that had a more formal curriculum for children under 4. This particular church had a different philosophy about how to teach young children. We shared our concerns and one of the pastors recommended that we try the Baptist church in town because their approach to Sunday school sounded like what we were looking for. A Bible church referred potential members to a Baptist church. Did you catch that?

Many of our friends have asked, "So, what are you now?"

"Christian," I answer. We are Christ-followers who have found a fellowship of believers in a Baptist church where we can worship together and grow in the Word. It's that simple.

15,921,408 minus 2

2010-09-03T16:58:00.000-05:00

According to Seventh-day Adventist church statistics, the membership stands at 15,921,408. Ben and I sent our membership removal letter this week, so soon, that number will stand at 15,921,406. Here's the letter:

August 30, 2010

Pastor ***** **********
Valley Crossroads SDA Church
11350 Glenoaks Boulevard
Pacoima, CA 91331

Dear Pastor *********,

We respectfully request that our membership be removed from the records of the Valley Crossroads Seventh-day Adventist Church and also removed from any and all the records of the Seventh-day Adventist denomination (including mailing lists)..

We were truly blessed by the contacts and friendships we made during our time at Valley Crossroads. Please be assured that this decision is not based on any ill-treatment, negative experiences, crisis of faith or inappropriate behavior. We’ve simply chosen to trust in Jesus Christ alone for salvation and believe the Bible to be our sole and final authority.

As outlined in my letter of resignation as pastor in the Southern California Conference, we do not believe that Scripture supports:
• The Mission of the Church (3 Angels’ Messages)
• The SDA Church is the remnant church (Fundamental Belief #13)
• Investigative Judgment/Pre-Advent Judgment (Fundamental Belief #24)
• Ellen G. White is a messenger of God (Fundamental Belief #18)
• Sabbath is the seal of God
• The Great Controversy worldview (Fundamental Belief #8)

Please be clear that this decision is not personal. Though we can no longer be a part of this denomination, we love the people of Valley Crossroads and will always cherish the time we had together.

To avoid any misunderstandings regarding this request, we will be sharing this letter online. Please provide us with written confirmation that this request has been voted/granted.

We continue to pray for the people of Valley Crossroads as you sincerely seek the Lord through His Word.

For His Glory,

Pastor Benjamin McPhaull

Delina Pryce McPhaull

Do you know what the Bible says?

2010-05-15T12:50:00.000-05:00

Quizzes by Quibblo.com

All four verses!

2009-12-13T13:30:00.000-06:00

Caroline commanded me not to call her asking to say her verses. Cathy says she's going to call me on Monday with her verses. Becky...well, Becky is in my video, but she ain't saying verses. Virginah said she thought we were on vacation from verse memorization. Latoya well, her and Eugene Peterson (The Message)are still trying to work on their New Bahamian Living Translation.

Here's my video with all four verses. Really, really try to look past the hair.

Here's Marlene with hers.

In your inbox you'll find the next verse chosen by Becky.

Latoya emerges AKA don't try this at home

2009-12-01T08:55:00.001-06:00

Latoya has emerged and sent in her video for the Isaiah passage. Let's just say she chose to memorize the New Bahamian Paraphrase. LOL! A for effort Latoya! Can't wait to hear your 4-verse rendition.

Isaiah 40: 28-31

2009-11-27T19:40:00.001-06:00

I was in the middle of a 22-hour stretch of no sleep, due mostly to the fact that I had been up getting ready for a friend's birthday party. Virginiah (she's part of this memorization thing too) texted and said something to the effect of... "I know he gives power to the weak and strength to the powerless, but I'm sure you would settle for just a nap." Ain't that the truth. "Don't want to soar, run or walk right now," I wrote.

Anyway, I got to talk to most of you today (Latoya is missing in action). I wish, oh, I would pay MONEY to have a tape of Cathy's memorization song. It was a classic. The next person I spoke with was Caroline, she admitted to learning the first part as a rap, which she demonstrated. Sorry, don't have that on tape either.

But here's Becky doing her verse. I think you'll love her:

And here's Marlene:

And me. I didn't quite have it down until the final hour. There is a question for you to answer at the end of my video, so watch the whole thing, or forward it to the end.

And since singing seems to be the theme of this round of memorization, here's a related song. In our home, this song plays often. I first heard it at a Beth Moore event and love it. Now I love it even more. And yes, we listen to this style of praise music in our home. Thanks. Listen to it while you write your insightful answer to my question...

how i memorize

2009-11-24T18:13:00.000-06:00

How do you memorize?

James 1:12-15

2009-11-13T16:39:00.000-06:00

Here's Caroline on why she chose the passage: (note--at the beginning, she recites all 3 verses that we've done.)

When you were memorizing this week, did you think about instances in your life, where a temptation, stemming from a desire in your heart, led to sinful actions?
What are some of your desires that tempt you to do wrong?
And what do you think is the difference between being tempted and being tested?
Just some things to think about...

Here's Marlene doing her verse:

Here I am doing my verse (with Maxine in tow).

James 1:12-15 (NLT)
God blesses those who patiently endure testing and temptation. Afterward they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him. And remember, when you are being tempted, do not say, “God is tempting me.” God is never tempted to do wrong, and he never tempts anyone else. Temptation comes from our own desires, which entice us and drag us away. These desires give birth to sinful actions. And when sin is allowed to grow, it gives birth to death.

Matthew 6:25-27

2009-10-30T10:12:00.001-05:00

First, a here's Marlene on why she chose this passage:

I memorized the NLT again, and started with verse 24 'cause I couldn't just start with "That is why... ." My mind kept asking the question, "WHAT is why?" So I went back to read why we shouldn't worry about everyday life when we're serving God. As I read on (though I didn't memorize the rest) I was struck by verse 32 that says "These things dominate the thoughts of unbelievers...." So, if I'm worrying about these things, then I'm acting like someone who doesn't know God. Wow!

“No one can serve two masters. For you will hate one and love the other; you will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money. That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food, and your body more than clothing? Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are? Can all your worries add a single moment to your life? (NLT)

5 years ago, I vowed

2009-10-16T08:34:00.000-05:00

Five years ago, tomorrow. This video gets more fun to watch as the years go by. And what a blast to watch it with Maxton!

Marriage has been a true blessing for me, due in no small part to the fact that I'm married to Benjamin McPhaull....who frustrates me, challenges me, loves me, teaches me and holds me accountable. I can't think of anything better than getting to do life with this guy. I look forward to our future --- ministry, parenting and living. We've been through enough drama to be secure that when times get rough, we lean on each other and grow stronger together. What joy there is in knowing THAT. It's the kind of thing that lets you sleep soundly...oh wait, we have 2 newborns...sleeping soundly is not an option.

This weekend, I'm reminding myself of our vows. I want to be a better wife, a true life partner, encourager, supporter, lover and friend. Here's to 50 more years, Ben.

What I vowed then, what I vow today:

I, Delina, rejoice in the opportunity to be your wife
and choose you, Benjamin as my husband

I accept you as you are and receive you as God’s gift to me.
I promise to love you as Christ loves you
And to forgive you as He forgives me

I acknowledge my weakness before you
And vow to continually look to God for strength,
As I place your needs above my own

I promise to trust and follow you, as you follow God
so together we can build a home that glorifies Him

I promise to keep myself open to you,
revealing my innermost fears and feelings, secrets and dreams.
I will unfailingly share and support your hopes and aspirations.

When you fall, I will catch you.
When you laugh, I will share your joy.
When you cry, I will comfort you.

And in those difficult times
I will remember this moment and the love that brought us here.

I will love you and you alone
Unconditionally
Limitlessly
Completely
As long as I live

Romans 8:38, 39

2009-10-16T07:30:00.000-05:00

Ladies,
I'm really excited about memorizing Scripture with you guys. I know that it never feels like there are enough hours in the day and in-depth Bible study often gets pushed to the side. We've gotta find ways to stay in the Word though. Hopefully this will be a start and will ignite an unquenchable thirst for more of God and His word in all of our lives.

Romans 8:38, 39 (NLT)
And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.

*sorry for the video quality... it's like a kung-fu movie! Just close your eyes and listen. There's nothing to watch, really.... and whoops! Looks like I didn't do it word for word... Will do better next time.

FIND YOUR STRONGEST LIFE book review

2009-10-06T02:08:00.000-05:00

A note: I am a Thomas Nelson book review blogger and got this book free, in exchange for a review posted on my blog.

When I first got the book, Find Your Strongest Life, my first thought was, what’s so Christian about it and why is Thomas Nelson publishing it. I even twittered the question and @ThomasNelson wrote me back saying: “we publish all kinds of books that are from a Christian worldview, some aren't overtly Christian subjects.”
I continued reading with this in mind, but in the end, I still feel the same way. This book is decisively NOT from a Christian worldview. It’s not offering anything different, as a solution, than “the world” has to offer (and you have to wonder if the author did, would he be promoted by Oprah?).
The book is good and smart if you want more of the same --- a self-led checklist of how to improve your life and be more satisfied. In its defense, it does concentrate on a person’s unique gifts but it still doesn’t include your Creator’s role in your quest for satisfaction. It’s just another book to teach you how to attain the goals that the world has defined for you. The book is targeted to women, and doesn’t question the feminist values that women have grown up with and evaluate those values and goals from a biblical perspective. That’s what I would expect from a book about finding your strongest life published by a Christian publisher.

Fearless book review

2009-09-08T03:02:00.000-05:00

I was sorta dreading reading Fearless, the new Max Lucado book because after having read several of his books in the past, his writing style gets old. I start wondering if his style is computer-generated with all the similes and metaphors. Too much of a good thing...

Anyway, I went into the book thinking that I'm not really a person who operates out of fear. But as I finished each chapter, I was able to see how applicable his fear solutions are for my life.

The book is more of a collection of stand-alone chapters that would work fabulously as devotionals. There are some amazing concepts and illustrations. The stories will intrigue you. The thoughts will make you think. The challenge to live faith-fully vs. fearfully will motivate you.

Lucado tackles fears surrounding loss of things/money, death, calamity, worry, the future and overwhelming challenges. I especially enjoyed the chapter about surrendering your kids to Christ. He helps you see how silly it is to try to live the safe life and do everything in our power to guard against every worst-case scenario. I was surprised at how much the Bible had to say directly about not being afraid!

Though the book is a fast read In order for the truths in this book to soak in, this book is best read methodically, answering the questions in the included discussion guide. Read slowly and with intention to apply the principles and concepts, this book has the potential to be life-changing. Great devotional book. It's also one that would would be good for discussion with a prayer partner or small group. Get this book.

my workshop for nurses

2009-07-10T12:50:00.001-05:00

I'm not a nurse, but in the last 2 years I've had to deal with so many of them (as a patient) that I think they could learn a lot from a patient's perspective. My workshop for nurses in the field and nurses-in-training would be an overview of these lessons:

If you hate your job, your co-workers, your hospital, the doctors and the patients annoy you, please, please find another line of work. Or at the very least, keep your attitude in check and out of your patient's room. Don't argue with other nurses in the presence of the patient or bring your disgruntled-ness into a patient's room. Believe it or not, your mood does affect the patient's experience, it affects the way you do your job, the way you interpret data, the way you communicate with the other staff about the patient and his/her needs. Get a grip. It matters.

Don't assume that every patient believes like you do. Don't assume that every woman wants an epidural. Don't assume that every woman is comfortable with a c-section. Instead of saying..."are you going to try to attempt a vaginal delivery," how about asking, what are your plans for delivery? I make it a point to answer the former question with, "No, I'm not going to "try to attempt," I'm going to do it!" Sure would be nice to get encouragement instead of doubt, from the very people who are trained to help you.

Use encouraging words and an encouraging tone. Skip the horror stories of what happened to other patients. Skip the scare tactics to garner compliance. A positive and supportive attitude goes a loooong way in garnering trust and mutual respect. Just 'cause you have on scrubs doesn't mean I automatically trust you and am going to cooperate.

Nursing is supposed to be a calling. Try to remember you're there for the patient and you're not just there "doing your job." This should be more than just a paycheck. What you're doing is providing a service, a ministry, it's more than a job. The minute you start thinking otherwise, then please take some deep breaths, go to a spa, take your vacation. You're doing more harm than good by spilling your bad vibes on your patients.

Remember than practicing medicine is more than just a clinical thing. Your patients have moods, feelings, anxieties that affect their physical well-being and stress level. Talk to your patients. Don't rely primarily on machines and gadgets to evaluate the situations.

And one note for dealing with pregnant women. It's not really useful (for the woman) if you say things like, "Are you sure you've felt the baby move recently?" or some other question based on the fact that your equipment is not working... I know it's all a ploy to make the woman fearful and at the mercy of the medical establishment, but c'mon. The next question inevitably is, "hmmmm, why is your blood pressure so high." Can you put yourself in the pregnant woman's shoes for 10 minutes?

One of the worst things that happened during the drama of our first pregnancy was overhearing a doctor and a resident's conversation:
Doctor: "She needs an ultrasound every day."
Resident: "I don't really remember how to do them."
Doctor: "Okay, honestly, you just need to make sure that the baby is alive."

Then, during the same ordeal, there was a team of residents in my room, discussing my "case" in front of me as if I were invisible.

What's just another case to you is real life to your patients.
If you don't remember anything else, remember that.

economic 6 degrees of separation

2009-05-29T17:28:00.001-05:00

Thought these two videos were kinda cool. They're segments from CBS News.

Part 1

Part 2

my twitter experiment

2009-05-04T14:09:00.001-05:00

A week ago I started twittering, set up my phone to twitter and even set up twitpic. It's not something I'll soon become addicted to, that's for sure.

Here's why:

There's hardly any interaction on Twitter. Maybe my contact list is too small. Maybe the people who are my contacts don't respond to tweets. But it's a little too monologue-ish for me...if this is indeed social networking media.
Not enough of my friends are twittering and not enough of them twitter consistently enough to keep me coming back for more updates.
Too much of what's on Twitter is on Facebook. I'm reading stuff twice.

Here's why I will continue twittering:

My main purpose in twittering was to chronicle this twin pregnancy. I've been terrible at journaling. This way, I can journal as I go, no matter where I am and it's forever recorded.
It's interesting to follow some of the people I don't know.
If I stick it out, maybe more and more of my friends will join and make it interesting.

Follow me on Twitter!

how to keep the Sabbath

2009-05-04T13:58:00.000-05:00

Right. On. The. Money.

***
by Chip Brogden

http://www.TheSchoolOfChrist.Org/articles/sabbath.html

"The Son of Man is Lord even of the Sabbath day" (Mt. 12:8).

The Sabbath (and every other thing in the Old Covenant) points to a spiritual fulfillment in Christ. Jesus is not bound by any rule, or regulation, or tradition, that says thou shalt, or thou shalt not. He is Lord over the Sabbath; the Sabbath is not lord over Him.

We who are in Christ do keep the Sabbath, but the Sabbath for us is not a day of the week. It is certainly not a day for attending religious services. It has nothing to do with the calendar. If we want to keep the Sabbath we need only abide, continue, and dwell in Christ, as the branch abides, continues, and dwells in the Vine. For the branch is resting in the Vine. The branch does not struggle or worry or force itself through sheer effort to produce fruit. Instead, it simply lives in union with the Vine, and in that sense, it rests. It trusts in the Life of the Vine to produce the fruit. And this is the principle of the Sabbath rest.

Now we see this rest in Christ. You would suppose that, as the Son of God, He had the liberty and freedom to say and do whatever He pleased. But He frankly stated, "I do nothing of Myself. It is the Father that dwells in Me, and He does the works." This, my friend, is rest. He is the Lord of the Sabbath. Jesus mastered the art of observing the Sabbath day. What does it mean? It means I do nothing of Myself. My teaching is not My own, but it belongs to the One Who sent Me. And I do nothing except what I see my Father do, and I speak nothing except what I hear my Father speak. That is extraordinary. But that is what it means to rest in the Lord.

Now our relationship to Christ is to be exactly the same as Christ's relationship to the Father. I do nothing apart from Christ. I speak nothing apart from Christ. And I do nothing and speak nothing in my own strength, but I trust in the life of the Lord Jesus to do in me and through me what I cannot do.

Or, if you like, it is the place Paul describes in Galatians 2:20: "It is no longer I who lives, but Christ who lives in me." Not I, but Christ. This is the secret to the Christian life. And may I say that this: "not I, but Christ" is the normal Christian life. It is the way it is supposed to be, from the very beginning.

Remember that Adam's first day of life, after he was created, was a day of rest. Now the Christian life begins the same way. If any one is in Christ, the Bible says that he or she is a new creation. You are born-again; you are born from above. And the first lesson you learn in this spiritual life in Christ is not doing, but being; it is not working, but resting.

How disappointing that the harlot church -- the religious system -- does not teach you how to enter into rest. It wants to immediately put you to work. And so you wear yourself out, trying to be holy, trying to be more like Christ, trying to please people -- the pastor, the elders, your fellow church members. And you sometimes feel as if you can never do enough. You can never give enough, you can never volunteer enough, you can never attend enough. And my, the guilt you feel whenever you say no, or whenever you feel as if you aren't doing enough!

Your first day in Christ is a day of rest. Now let's not get tied down to a calendar. That first "day" in Christ may take weeks or years. We are after the spiritual principle of the Sabbath day, and we are not talking about a twenty-four hour period. This is something you learn and you walk in the rest of your life. How unfortunate that people do not begin with resting in Christ. They get saved, and they go to work for religion, and they are like a slave living in Egypt instead of a Hebrew living in the land of milk and honey. Then after so many years of slavery they become institutionalized, and think this is the way the Christian life is supposed to be.

Well, it is that way for many people, but it does not have to be that way. Your first day in Christ is a day of rest. Works will come. But your first day as a new creature in Christ is a day of rest. It will be a day of rest until you learn what it means to abide in Christ, to dwell in Him, to rest in His finished work. That is the basis of everything else. If the word "season" helps you to understand this better than a "day" then think of it as a Sabbath season. But the first lesson is how to rest. That is the principle of the Sabbath.

I hope you are beginning to see how far and beyond this goes. From this perspective you see how silly it is to get all worked up into a lather over Sunday or Saturday, Sabbath day or Lord's day, what you can do and what you can't do. Those are arguments for little children. Let us go on to maturity. Let us put away childish things and become men and women of spiritual wisdom and discernment. God is after a spiritual condition, a spiritual result, and to get it He goes to work deep within your heart. That is the basis of the New Covenant.

*****

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Barack Obama greets Costa Rica President Oscar Arias

2009-04-29T13:58:00.001-05:00

P041709PS-0305
Originally uploaded by The Official White House Photostream.

I have a new blog

2009-04-21T02:56:00.000-05:00

Like I don't have enough already...

I recently started The Mami Diaries, where I chronicle the challenges, issues, thoughts and advice about mothering. I write the blog like it's really for me... without regard to how my militant views about certain mothering issues will be perceived by those choosing a more mainstream approach. It's Delina chronicling the journey, not Delina hoping to call a truce to Mommy Wars, argue, fight or prove that I'm right. It's how I'm doing it. Take it or leave it. I wanted to keep a record 'cause this double-placenta brain forgets things.

The other places where I blog, besides Girl..., where I get to vent and post about anything and everything...

Our family blog - where I keep our faraway friends and family up-to-date on our family life.

Clutch - the place where I co-blog for pastors' wives under 40.

McPhotos - the photo blog that I never update.

Epidural Shmepidural

2009-04-15T22:37:00.000-05:00

I've wanted this t-shirt for a long time...but I don't want to jinx myself... maybe I'll buy it after labor.

Scripture memorization

2009-04-15T22:26:00.000-05:00

I've been trying to memorize verses on and off. My recent goal has been to memorize larger portions of scripture...not a whole chapter or anything, but just several verses. I never quite got 1 Corintians 13 cemented in my head....even with my little song... I put that aside for a bit.

Here's the one I did last month, typed by memory.

Psalm 68:1-5 (NLT)

Oh God, You are my God
I earnestly search for you.
My soul thirsts for you.
My whole body longs for you
In this parched and weary land
where there is no water.

I have seen you in your sanctuary
and gazed upon your power and glory
Your unfailing love is better than life itself
Oh how I praise you.

I will praise you as long as I live
Lifting up my hands to you in prayer
You satisfy me better than the richest feast
I will praise you with songs of joy.

Right now I'm working on the last part of Galatians 6:7-10. That last sentence has me stuck. Stay tuned. My placenta brain will not turn to mush!

haunting

2009-03-26T11:19:00.000-05:00

i love the time capsule

2009-02-16T00:39:00.000-06:00

Photojojo has a really cool, free service that links up to flickr and shows you the most interesting photos you took/uploaded a year ago. it's called a time capsule. i love it, especially to see how Maxton looked a year ago. check out the one I received today.

my inspiration

2009-02-16T00:05:00.001-06:00

i'm not reinventing a thing

2009-02-14T12:57:00.001-06:00

last night i saw that this is the blog of the month on the Reinventing the Adventist Wheel website. i want to make it clear that I am not part of, supportive of, or interested in reinventing a doggone thing. in addition, this is not an SDA blog (as they label it).

yes, i sometimes read the blog. i sometimes even comment on posts. but i am not part of their "movement" and neither is my blog. here's why:

i don't believe that you can reinvent adventism. it is what it is. take it or leave it. its roots run deep and to reinvent would be merely putting lipstick on a pig -- purely cosmetic.

i believe that if you want to be a part of an organization/denomination/group that better fits your spiritual beliefs, then you should go find one, not reinvent the one that you happen to find yourself in. sorta like the whole gay marriage debate... there's no need to redefine marriage, just go do your thing and call it something else.

i will go as far to say that the notion of progressive adventism is a farce and a thin veil to mask that these people don't really have the guts to leave an organization that they don't believe is right and true. the whole blog gives these "progressives" an outlet to vent, yet never have to act on their issues with adventism.

adventism is not a democracy. did the GC give you permission to reinvent anything? what difference are you really making to the "official" adventism.

i don't believe anyone should try to reform something that the majority of the worldwide membership is very happy with...not just happy, but passionate about.

the poll posted on the blog is very telling. it asks readers to choose the top reason they're still adventist. it lists choices like fear of losing salvation for leaving, the sabbath and cultural identity. i challenge all reinventors to honestly explore their reasons for staying adventist. you don't need a band of renegades to do this with. it's something you must explore and pray about on your own

while i'm at it, here's another challenge for all progressives and disgruntleds alike: search the Scriptures and ask the Holy Spirit's guidance and courage to go where God wants you to go. stop spending your energy trying to fix the system 'cause the system (broken or fixed) won't save you. take hold of that wheel you're trying to reinvent and ride it out to where God can grow you spiritually.

i suspect i won't be the blog of the month for much longer.

being a supportive friend: a guide for the childfree

2009-02-10T14:12:00.001-06:00

I've been meaning to write this post for months. Now that I've announced that we're expecting twins, you might be tempted to think that this post is about me. But it's not. These are just some suggestions on how you can be a good friend to a woman in your life who has a brand new baby.

1. don't call. first off, mom and dad are catching zzzz's when they can. it's totally random and unpredictable. if you call and leave a message, you put the burden on them to call you back. send an email. send a text message.
2. don't expect a handwritten, proper thank-you note for generic baby gear that you purchased. if you want to be sincerely and profusely thanked, see#4,5, 10, 11. thank you notes, though important, are just not priority. gift your mom friend the peace of mind that she does not owe you a thank you note and you do not expect one. plus, be honest. you're going to throw away the dumb note anyway...
3. don't ask how you can help. say, "i'm going to do X, Y, Z..what time can i come by? and you better not clean up 'cause I'm coming over."
4. bring/send food. don't ask what they want and from where. surprise her with what you think they'll like.
5. when you come over, grab a load of the baby's laundry and put it in the washer. start the washer.
6. don't come over expecting to sit in the rocking chair and hold the baby. mom needs help with housework, not baby holding.
7. don't ask to hold the baby. if the mother offers, then promptly get up, go wash your hands, hold the baby, and ask mom if she needs to go do something (pump milk, take shower, brush teeth, take a short nap, grab something to eat) while you hold the baby.
8. don't come over if you're sick. even your claim that it's "just allergies" will make a new mom nervous.
9. don't stay long (unless you're doing something productive for the family) and don't expect a long leisurely, thought-provoking and engaging conversation. hello? the woman just grew a human for 9 months, gave birth (no description necessary, right?) and is nursing non-stop and getting little sleep with no end in sight. this is not the time to talk about Obama's latest proposal or the crisis in North Korea.
10. bring books, magazines,...and food.
11. if you can afford it, or if you can organize a friend pool, pay for a maid to come over to do the heavy duty cleaning than mom probably won't get to until the baby is crawling.
12. listen if she feels like sharing her birth story, but don't prod too much. not everyone wants to talk about what it feels like when the baby is crowning.
13. don't be alarmed if mom seems down, not herself, tired, not giddy that she has a cute little baby to call her own. refer to #9 if you need to be reminded what she's just been through. this is not the movies. this is real life. real work.
14. offer to babysit when the couple feels comfortable leaving their baby with someone. but if, when mom is changing baby's diaper, you freak out at the sight of orange poop, or if you get upset that your cashmere sweater just got spit up on, don't be offended when they don't call you.
15. one last note, for those who've had a baby. don't forget or worse yet, sugarcoat what life was like those first 6-8 weeks. be the friend you wish you'd had.

social networking with people you live with

2009-02-06T00:22:00.000-06:00

Me: Baby, I'm disappointed.

Ben: I know. I saw your facebook status.

Me: You coulda just looked at my face....

Finally! Somebody is making sense....

2009-01-19T15:15:00.000-06:00

Professor Benjamin Barber should be on Obama's Cabinet.

Here's an excerpt from a recent interview on the Tavis Smiley show on PBS.

On Obama and the economic crisis:

Barber: So the question here is going to be now what new ideas do we have, or are we simply going to try to restore where we were two or three years ago or 10 years ago, get back to people spending money they don't have on commodities they don't need?
Are banks going to go back to lending people money to buy stuff for which there is no real express want or need? Or are we going to change our habits? Are people going to begin to say, "Happiness is something we don't have to buy?" Capitalism has to change its habits, and consumers have to change their habits. And there, the president needs to provide leadership, and that means more than bailing our industries, bailing out companies, bailing out banks, going back to where we were five years ago.

If we succeed in redressing this crisis by simply going back to where we were in 2005 or 1995, we're in deep trouble, because it'll be back again, worse, the next time. We've got to change how people think, we have to change how people view capitalism, capitalism has to change its habits and go back to making honest money by meeting real needs, not easy money by manufacturing needs for people who can't afford the goods being thrown at them.

How NOT to raise an American

2008-12-16T15:20:00.000-06:00

I saw the book, How to Raise an American, at the bookstore and thought,... well, that's a book I DON'T want to read.

As important as I think it is to learn US history (particularly if you live in the States), there are some very American attitudes, habits, perspectives that I do not want my US-born child(ren) to adopt. Here's a short list:

The US is the center of the universe. It is the greatest country in the world. Nobody else lives in a free society. You're lucky to be born here.
Anything American -- food, clothes, TV, politicians, policies, education, lifestyle, is "superior."
The rest of the world is inferior, behind, third-world, has nothing to offer. We are here to civilize them and to teach them our better way of doing life.
Traveling outside of the US is not safe, unless it's on a cruise ship where we can dock at the very American ports where it's "safe."
My highest aspiration is to be "normal" and blend in with everyone and live a life that is a checklist of acceptable behavior. No risks. Just a nice comfortable life with a good job, 401k, house, white picket fence, job and 2.5 kids. Otherwise known as the American dream.
It's all about me and how much I can accumulate in my lifetime. My taxes will pay for government services to take care of the poor. I gotta take care of me and mine.
I love stuff. I love gadgets and I have to have the latest and greatest. I work hard and I deserve it.
I'm not being disrespectful! I'm just exercising my freedom of speech.
You're violating MY RIGHTS and I'M TAKING YOU TO COURT.
I am sooooooo cool. I must see every movie on opening night. I watch ET and Access Hollywood religiously. I have all the DVD collection of XYZ show/movie. I must have that new handbag. And "Mom! I need a new outfit for the party this weekend!"
I want to be a celebrity. Even for just 5 minutes through a YouTube clip that gets distributed worldwide.
Oh wait. I am a celebrity in my own mind.
Anyone with less education (or a different education), with an accent, with a different way of life, who dresses funny and doesn't watch the latest, hottest show/movie, or has the latest iPod with the #1 song downloaded, is and will be treated as a second-class citizen.
Our economy suffers because companies ship jobs overseas...but I sure love my bargain-basement prices!
I'll stick to the foods I know and the brands I like, thanks.
Everyone else is responsible for my aches and pains, my troubles, my problems. It's somebody else's fault. Always.

Okay... I said this would be a short list. Certainly, all Americans aren't like this... but I think you have to be very intentional about raising a child in this American culture without him/her adopting these attitudes. Right or wrong?

Our great depression

2008-12-16T14:47:00.000-06:00

This is my hundredth post. Yeah!

Remember, in grade school, reading about the Great Depression and how in World War II the government imposed civilian rations for food, gas, medicine and other essentials? What if something similar happened today? What sacrifices might we need to make in order to put our personal budgets back on track in this Great Recession?

One of the reasons that I voted for Obama is because he's smart and motivational. If he told every American family to tighten their economic belts, most of us would listen. It would be a message that would be better received than if it was coming from the guy that doesn't know how many houses he owns.

Okay, but back to our way of life... This is what I can't stand about American thinking... We see problems, fundamental problems, and we want to fix them without changing our way of life. We want hybrid SUVs and any other solution that maintains our lifestyle, makes us feel good about "doing our part" and doesn't incovenience us one bit. We see the gas prices going down and we decide it's time for a cross-country roadtrip. Or like the lady on the Today Show said this morning, since the economy is in decline, it's a great time to start buying new appliances because you're going to be spending a lot more time at home preparing your own food. Now there's some logic (I wonder whose payroll she's on).

The mere fact that our country's economy is built on credit and not on real cash, means that we can have car lots full of cars waiting to be bought, it means that we can have huge warehouse stores with inventory (purchased on credit, whose manufacturing was done on credit, and most likely the consumer will purchase the goods on credit). It's a giant pyramid scheme that is crashing right now... but we just want the government to fix it. The big businesses just want a bailout. Nobody wants to give up his way of life in order to fundamentally change the economic system.

I'm no economist, but what would it mean if to our way of life, if we were cash only? If credit didn't exist? or if it just existed with very limited terms?

Would we all live in our own little castles? 4 bedrooms for 2 people? 4000 square feet for a family of 4? Would we have to co-op more and actually live together with extended family?
Would we have to save up for a car, order it and wait for it to be made?
Would we have to eat more fruits and vegetables because pre-packaged meals wouldn't be so readily available on the shelves?
Would there be enough jobs for Dad and Mom to both work?
Would recycling be optional?
Would we know our neighbors and have to depend more on each other to barter goods and services vs. just paying someone?
Would we have to depend on other people to help us get out of a bind vs. pulling out the Visa?
Would we live more in community and lose some of our independence?
Would we have to share our warm homes, our water, our food, our hard-earned cash? Would we have to sacrifice for others?
Would we be inconvenienced?

What changes would you be willing to make in order to have more economic stability in your life and in the country...even if it meant adjusting your standard of living?

Let it snow?

2008-12-16T13:46:00.001-06:00

In the past, we've thrown away a lot of CDs that contain music that doesn't reflect our values and morals. Of course, we try to be as discerning when we're listening to songs on the radio. I continue to lament the fact that virtually no songs out there reflect married-people love. Someone in the song is always begging the other one to spend the night, or talking about how they just met, etc.

In order to enjoy the Christmas carol, Let it Snow!, I've decided that the couple is married, but separated and living apart. They're in the process of reconciling.

Oh the weather outside is frightful,
But the fire is so delightful,
And since we've no place to go,
Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!

It doesn't show signs of stopping,
And I've bought some corn for popping,
The lights are turned way down low,
Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!

When we finally kiss goodnight,
How I'll hate going out in the storm!
But if you'll really hold me tight,
All the way home I'll be warm.

The fire is slowly dying,
And, my dear, we're still good-bying,
But as long as you love me so,
Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!

My Michelle Obama-inspired necklace

2008-11-19T23:01:00.000-06:00

Okay, I will not turn into one of these people who takes her cues about womanhood from our soon-to-be first lady, Michelle Obama. Promise.
But I saw this necklace at the store, and then I saw Michelle had one similar and it just made me want it more. But I didn't want to spend the money. But then I won a sort of bet between Ben and me about finding a nowhere-to-be-found Netflix movie... and I got to go buy my necklace!

I love it and love wearing it. You like?

hide it in your heart

2008-11-13T14:28:00.001-06:00

by heart.
Originally uploaded by McPryce.

Inspired by Mega Memory Month, Dorla and I are taking the challenge to memorize a larger-than-we-would-ordinarily-attempt passage of Scripture.

We will see each other on December 5th when we'll video ourselves saying this passage from memory. Three weeks to memorize this:

1 Corinthians 13 (NLT)

If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn’t love others, I would only be a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. If I had the gift of prophecy, and if I understood all of God’s secret plans and possessed all knowledge, and if I had such faith that I could move mountains, but didn’t love others, I would be nothing. If I gave everything I have to the poor and even sacrificed my body, I could boast about it; but if I didn’t love others, I would have gained nothing.

Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

Prophecy and speaking in unknown languages and special knowledge will become useless. But love will last forever! Now our knowledge is partial and incomplete, and even the gift of prophecy reveals only part of the whole picture! But when full understanding comes, these partial things will become useless.

When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up, I put away childish things. Now we see things imperfectly as in a cloudy mirror, but then we will see everything with perfect clarity. All that I know now is partial and incomplete, but then I will know everything completely, just as God now knows me completely.

Three things will last forever—faith, hope, and love—and the greatest of these is love.

Wanna join us?

The Faith of Barack Obama

2008-10-27T00:31:00.000-05:00

The Faith of Barack Obamais a fascinating, well-researched, fast-paced book. If you're still undecided about who to vote for, are confused about how Obama has lured the masses (it's not a spell) or if you just want some insight into this man's faith, you must get this book. It's 7 days to the election, I know. This book will give you lots of insight, no matter what happens. The author doesn't seem to be an Obama supporter. He treats the issues with an even hand, and offers thought-provoking commentary and analysis on the political process, historical and contemporary historical figures and the current players in the presidential race.

The most enlightening part of the book is how it explains why Obama is so popular. He's very much a postmodern Christian who is fluid with his beliefs and open about his doubts. It resonates with the culture.

OBAMA'S CONNECTION TO POSTMODERNS

"Religiously, the majority of America's young are postmodern, which means they do faith like jazz: informal, eclectic, and often without theme. They have largely rejected organized religion in favor of a religious pastiche that works for them. They think nothing of hammering together a personal faith from widely differing religious traditions, and many acquire their theology the same way they catch colds: through casual contact with strangers. Thus, when Obama speaks of questioning certain tenets of his Christian faith or the importance of doubt in religion or his respect for non-Christian religions, the majority of the young instantly relate and welcome his nontraditional faith as a basis for his -- and their -- left-leaning politics."

"He does not use the language of the traditional convert to Christianity. He is the product of a new, postmodern generations that picks and chooses its own truth from traditional faith, much as a man customizes his meal at a buffet." When looking for a church Obama said "he was seeking a 'vessel' for his values, a 'community or shared traditions in which to ground my most deeply held beliefs.'"

HOW OBAMA'S FAITH AND POLITICS INTERSECT

"For Obama, faith is not simply political garb, something a focus group told him he ought to try. Instead, religion to him is transforming, lifelong, and real. It is who he is at the core, what he has raised his daughters to live, and the well he will draw from as he leads. While Americans are used to religious insincerity from their political leaders, Obama seems to be sincere in what he proclaims. He embraced religion long before he embraced politics. Indeed, it was his faith that gave him the will to serve in public office, and the worldview of that faith that shaped his understanding of what he would do once he came to power."

"For Obama, Bush is the face of the Religious Right, a movement that used faith to divide and conquer while in pursuit of political power, and then didn't know hwat to do with that power once they had it in hand."

ABOUT MCCAIN

"The details of McCain's faith were sketchy. Though an Episcopalian, McCain began attending North Phoenix Baptist Church when he married his second wife, Cindy. Ever the maverick, he never agreed to be baptized -- the confirmation of true faith in a Baptist church -- neither did he ever officially join the church."

CLASH OF CULTURES

"McCain will speak of a God whose blessing he seeks as he serves his country with honor. His opponent will likely speak in warm terms of a faith that fills the soul, of a mission that springs from the beloved words of Scripture. McCain will speak of tried-and-true values and of the American way. His opponent will speak of the teachings of Jesus and of making America a more righteous land. McCain will say that he prays, goes to church and reads the Bible, but then will say little more. His opponent will invite the press into Bible studies and distribute pages from spiritual journals written at transforming retreats. McCain will look like George Washington praying at Valley Forge. His opponent will hold a press conference after buying a personalized Bible at the mall."

In addition, the author explains the whole Jeremiah Wright incident with dexterity and depth.

ABOUT JEREMIAH WRIGHT:

"Jeremiah Wright is not crazy. He is an educated man with four earned degrees, respected in his church and his denomination, who has been an honored voice of black America. ... To claim him crazy and dismiss him from the scene without a hearing is to miss an opportunity to heal a grievous, festering wound."

"[Obama's] face stands out among them all [the other political candidates] It is black. It is under fifty in 2008. Interestingly, the author sees this point in history as a pivotal moment to heal historic wounds. "Perhaps this is a call for all of us to be more Christian than Republican, more American than Democrat, more noble and righteous than crassly and callously political." Sounds like something Obama would say.

You can read an excerpt here.

McCain, c'mon

2008-10-22T00:27:00.000-05:00

In the second presidential debate, McCain said:

"America is the greatest force for good in the history of the world."

Really, McCain? Really?

And how, exactly would you characterize the Jews? or Jesus, for that matter?

Wow.

Elections and Christians

2008-10-22T00:14:00.000-05:00

I am so sick of Christian pastors telling us to vote for John McCain. Sick of it.
Right now I'm listening to Jack Graham of Prestonwood Baptist Church tell me that as a Christian I need to vote my values and need to vote for who ever is pro-life. I'm tired of abortion being the litmus test of how Christian you are. I'm sooooo sick of it.

I was watching Joni Lamb on the Joni show last week and they were spouting the same nonsense. The guest on the show went as far to say that you're going to have to stand before Christ one day and say that you were more interested in fixing the economy and ending a war than in protecting the rights of the unborn with your presidential vote. What!?

I'm tired of so-called Christians only caring about the unborn when abortion comes into play. They don't care about the mother, the mother's circumstances (before, during and after baby) or natural childbirth for that matter.
I don't see any of these so-called Christians spending resources to address the needs of women who are forever changed by an abortion in their past.
Voting for John McCain isn't going to end abortion. It's not even going to end legalized abortion.
In the event that McCain is elected and can choose the next few Supreme Court justices, he stated plainly in the debate that the person's stance on abortion would not make or break his support. Were any of you tunnel-visioned preachers paying attention?
Obama doesn't like abortion or promote it. Stop sensationalizing the issue. Lying and manipulating the truth are sins just like abortion.
Jesus gives us choices and we should stop trying to legislate morality. It doesn't change the heart of the woman (or man) and the heart is what concerns Christ.

The whole Republican Christian Right thing is getting sooooooo old. I don't buy it and neither should you.

One

2008-09-10T15:22:00.001-05:00

IMG_8316
Originally uploaded by McPryce.

My baby boy is one! Unbelievable.

Failin' Palin

2008-09-02T11:30:00.000-05:00

I had many different titles for this blog post:

Failin' Palin
The Anti-abortion Feminist
You can't have it both ways
A sling does not a mother make

I am flabbergasted that so many Christian stay-at-home mom-type women are heralding Palin in as role model for motherhood. I feel like writing about how she's nothing more than a feminist (which these women continually denounce) who is anti-abortion. How can these women ignore all of the anti-family choices that Palin has made (and is making) in favor of her career?

Don't get me wrong, I'm not judging the woman for her choices. She can do whatever she wants to do. I just can't understand why women who say they're against the I-can-do-it-all culture, identify with a woman like Palin.

From a 5/10/08 USA Today piece:

Three days after giving birth, Palin returned to work in her Anchorage office, accompanied by Trig and her husband.

This was not a mother's typical visit to the office to show off the new baby; instead, she was serving notice that a child of special needs will not hinder her professional commitments.

"It's a sign of the times to be able to do this," she said. "I can think of so many male candidates who watched families grow while they were in office.

"There is no reason to believe a woman can't do it with a growing family. My baby will not be at all or in any sense neglected."

Neither, Palin said, will the state, as she prepares to lead deliberations for a multibillion-dollar natural gas pipeline. That's the economic future of the state, a means of getting North Slope natural gas to consumers throughout North America.

"I will not shirk my duties," she said.

Yeah. Okay. Somebody is going to get short-changed. Guaranteed.

I think the women in this country should be insulted by McCain's choice for VP. You can't just expect women to vote woman and ignore the fact that Palin is so out of her league that I thought she was giving a speech to the PTA when I heard her give her acceptance speech. As much as I detest Hillary, Palin is no Hillary. You can't just expect the disgruntled Hillary supporters to trade in one woman for the other and ignore Palin's lack of credentials just to see a woman as the VP. Can you imagine Palin being president?!?!?!?!?

If you're a wife and mother and not a feminist, you too should be insulted. McCain is insinuating that Palin shares your values because she's pro-life and carries her baby in a sling. I would be scared to see what anti-family measures Palin has up her sleeve. What's the matter with you women who "can't" have 5 children, be a wife and run a state government? What's the matter with you women who "can't" get back to work 3 days after giving birth to a premature baby with special needs? Shorten that maternity leave, put the baby in a sling and go to work! Man up, girls!

No one can explain this anti-family choice better than Voddie Baucham. So, please read his post about it. Here's the bottom line:

Ironically, the Neocons are merely using Mrs. Palin as a political pawn. She is beloved because she gives them the coveted “moral high ground” in the upcoming debates. Read recent articles and the goals become clear. We must win on abortion. She makes it hard to argue for it. We must win on the race/gender issue. She gives us a woman to their ethnic minority. We must win on being young and hip. Obama is 47; Palin is 44. We must win the “change” argument. Obama is new to Washington; Palin has never served there. Checkmate!
Unfortunately, this political pawn represents a fatal worldview flaw. In an effort to win the pro-family political argument, we are sacrificing the pro-family biblical argument. In essence, the message being sent to women by conservative Christians backing McCain/Palin is, “It’s ok to sacrifice your family on the altar of your career; just don’t have an abortion.” How pro-family is that?

Pure FUN!

2008-08-28T17:46:00.000-05:00

The Beth Moore event (Living Proof Live) was inspiring, challenging, thought-provoking, informative, edifying, holy, and just pure FUN! My only beef (with myself) is that I lost my glasses the day of the event and had to squint the whole time. Still got blessed.

Even though I was looking very Mommy, I took (and posted!) the picture with Kelly Minter for my friend Latoya who couldn't come to LPL because she was in the midst of moving back to the Bahamas. Latoya and I are in the middle of Kelly Minter's Bible study, NO OTHER GODS. It truly has transformed and informed us and spoken directly to our situations...especially week 5, which talked about saying goodbyes and cleaning out.

My favorite moment was at the Siesta Fiesta reception where 1000 of us bloggers got to Q&A with Beth and her daughters. I love them because they are who they are, on the blog and in person. Her daughter, Melissa, cracks me up. So sarcastic and real. I could hang with her. Back to the favorite moment: Beth commented that "that baby is so cute!" (talking about Maxton). The Lifeway Lady gave me the mic and I was able to tell Beth that I almost named Maxton, Moore because of her. Because of the faith-building I did through her Believing God Bible study a year before my difficult pregnancy, I had something to draw on to stay sane and believe God no matter what. (I didn't get to say all that to her, but that's okay, 'cause I wrote her a letter a few months ago and sent her a picture of Maxton.)

Before you wonder why in the world I took Maxton to the LPL event, I only had Maxton for the Siesta Fiesta. Ben brought him to the arena so I could breastfeed him (note that I was LEAKING!!! in the picture of me and Dorla) and so he could pack up the car and check out of our hotel room. Maxton was such a charmer, waving and shaking hands with many of the women. He can be so Hollywood sometimes. I guess it's in the air here in LA.

I want to do a LPL event every year, though next year I'm torn between the one in California (5 hours away) or Portland (one of my favorite cities) or the Pastor's wives event in Nashville.

Anyone wanna come with?

Homemaking 101

2008-08-03T12:48:00.000-05:00

As I plunge deeper and deeper into my role as SAHM, I've been learning a lot and really admiring women who take this role seriously, strategically and professionally...like a "real" job. It's easy to assume that when you don't work outside the home, you have to put your brain, education, professional experience on hold to change diapers, fold laundry and breastfeed. But what I'm learning and understanding is that God is ready to use all of my skills, education and experience and use it in this season of my life as well. It's not on hold, not on the shelf, not on pause, it's simply redirected.

I found it interesting that Southwestern Baptist Theological Seminary is taking it one step futher into professionalizing homemaking. Check this out:

Homemaking

Preparing women to model the characteristics of a Godly woman as outlined in Scripture. This is done through instruction in homemaking skills, developing insights into home and family while continuing to equip women to understand and engage the culture of today. It is unique in that we recognize the need to challenge women both intellectually and practically. It is our mission to equip a woman to impact women and families for Christ.

Course Title	Course Number	Hours
Orientation to Homemaking	HMK 2101	1
Biblical Model for the Home and Family	HMK 3103	3
Nutrition	HMK 3113	3
Value of a Child	HMK 3203	3
Meal Preparation with Lab	HMK 3204	4
Senior Seminar	HMK 4101	1
Basics of Design	HMK 4103	3
Homemaking Practicum	HMK 4201	1
Clothing Construction with Lab	HMK 4204	4
Total		23

from SWBTS Course Catalog

Going again!

2008-07-31T13:12:00.000-05:00

I'm so excited to be attending another Living Proof Live event this year. This time I won't be by myself and will be with my sister, who incidentally first introduced me to Beth Moore. It's going to be soooooo much fun. I was browsing the LP website today and saw they had the commissioning that Beth Moore did at the San Diego event that I attended in April.

We held hands with someone next to us and repeated these words to each other. Like I said, I went by myself, so I was holding hands with a complete stranger and tears were streaming down my face. It all comes back to me just by reading these words...

My dear sister,
Before God formed you
He knew you
And set you apart
You are fearfully and wonderfully made
Praise God for His work of art
Turn from your self-loathing
And stop running from His plea
He cannot mess up your life
Every limitation He’s entrusted to you
Is to loose something excellent
Nothing about you is average
Start living like someone God loves
And every morning when you wake up
Know that He is thinking of you
Now, leave this place with Christ
Who will keep your feet from falling
And present you faultless before the throne with exceeding joy
Jesus is your life
Go take California with His love.

Whew!

I'm so proud of my nephew!

2008-07-17T10:23:00.001-05:00

there's the river!
Originally uploaded by Malie.

My nephew, Samuel, just returned from a mission trip (with his parents and grandparents) in the mountains of Costa Rica. There was no electricity up there and he hiked up the mountain for hours in the mud and darkness and rode in a canoe in the river. All that just to get to the location where they had VBS. I am so proud of my little guy (he's 6) for not complaining and being a brave little boy. I can only imagine how this experience is going to shape his future, his values, his perspective and his goals and dreams. One day Maxton will go on a mission trip with his dad and I'll be proud of him too when I hear all about their adventure ('cause Mama's staying home!)

This is what vacation looks like

2008-07-15T04:10:00.001-05:00

vacation.
Originally uploaded by McPryce.

A year ago...

2008-07-06T12:59:00.000-05:00

A year ago...

I was laying in a hospital bed, scared, vulnerable, with subdued fiestyness.
I saw my husband cry, not tear up, but bawl for the first time.
I experienced my husband love me and take care of me like never before.
I felt strong love from many friends and family and hurtful neglect from others whom I thought were friends.
I relied on God for every heartbeat, mine and the baby's.
I lived surrender.
I was humbled by experiencing a taste of what so many women endure in their journey to motherhood.
I was scared to dream about the future and scared not to.
I found out that spiritual warfare is very real.
I'd planned to tell Ben that if something happened to the baby, I wanted to go sit out on a beach somewhere and get my head together.

A year later...

Maxton is teaching me how to be a mom.
I love my son more than I knew I could love.
I'm wishing away (not working out, mind you) my baby belly.
The medical bills are rolling in.
I'm still not over some of the insensitivities and practices of some of the nurses, residents and doctors.
I'm enjoying my baby and marveling at the miracle and blessing of motherhood.
I'm humbled that God let me be Maxton's mom. Unmerited favor.
I'm happy just watching Ben and Maxton laugh and play.
I would go through it 50 times over for little Maxton.
I'm sitting on a beach, watching Maxton bask in the sun. Sweet.

Apples should not be juice

2008-07-06T12:56:00.000-05:00

I've tried to be cool about it, but I'm done. I'm done with apple juice. It's never satisfying. It lacks flavor, like there's something missing. You can't seem ever get it cold enough. Even with lots of ice, it's just not thirst-quenching. I feel myself guzzling it down too fast to try to quench that thirst spot, but it never works. I'm done with you, apple juice. I'll stick to apples. Ambrosia. Yum.

Word of the week - oikology

2008-06-25T23:55:00.000-05:00

oikology: (oy-koll'-uh-jee) n. the study, or science of housekeeping.

oooooh---i want to be an oikologist. That's what i'll answer when people ask me what I do. "I'm an oikologist and I take care of my son."

Notice, I STUDY housekeeping...don't get to doing it as often as I should.
It beats being a googleologist ( a person who web surfs all day).

Dental hygienists with a superiority complex

2008-06-14T23:58:00.001-05:00

Do you dread going to the dentists more because you hate the drilling or the grilling from the dental hygienist about how often you floss?

Why do DH's walk around with such a superiority complex? Like they're better that you because you have a little plaque. Why do they talk in such a patronizing tone? Why do they insist on re-education on how to brush, how often, how to floss and in what direction? (Make sure you get underneath the gum!)

Why do they act like they have their whole life together and they are so repulsed that they can tell what I had for lunch?

How 'bout they start being a little more thankful that so many of us are brush-n-floss slackers and that's why they have a job!

The next time I go, I'm going to have a few smart answers for the little lady in the white labcoat who thinks she's better than me.

"How often do you floss?"

Not often enough, obviously. (I actually said this to her at my last appointment)
Why I flossed just this morning!
Nonya
Take a wild guess!
About as often as you studied for the DAT

Got any to add to my list?

Hillary Campaign - Recap

2008-06-14T23:12:00.000-05:00

My anonymous friend* and I are having a hard time figuring out why people are still lovin' Hillary. Are they blind, deaf, forgetful or just as void of integrity as she is? People, people... have you forgotten? Lest we forget, here's a recap:

Hillary entered the race feeling entitled. Her "turn" had come, she was a shoe-in.

After Iowa, she went crazy.

She called this race a "hiring decision" and she sure lived up to the stereotypes of female bosses. She got overly emotional, one minute shedding tears, the next minute trash-talking before the big matchup in Ohio, and then in another show of her multiple personalities she tried to make nice with her opponent in a short-lived truce. Listen here, sister. I want a boss who's level headed, who shows grace under fire.

Hillary constantly insulted my intelligence in this campaign with all her doublespeak. ('Barack's less qualified than me and McCain, but I'd still pick him for my VP.')

We were repulsed by how Camp Hillary enlisted "black leaders" (congressmen Rangel & Lewis, BET's Bob Johnson) to denigrate Barack on the airwaves, trying to divide and conquer the black vote. That tactic obviously backfired.

I simply had it with Hillary pandering to rural, working class voters (read: whites), as if this multi-millionaire is the poster child for blue collar folk. As if by contrast, there is something wrong with Barack holding sway with educated, higher income Americans. Would his detractors like him any better if he were poor and uneducated?

She lied her way through the Bosnia snafu, but tried to fool us by saying she (I can't help but chuckle at this one) "misspoke." That was one of many signs that she was desparate to to get the top job, desperate enough to lie about her resume. Well, word of advice honey, don't lie unless you're good at it.

I'd like to hear someone defend this temper tantrum veiled as a legitimate campaign.

*My friend wanted to remain anonymous in this post but we wrote this post together.

Hillary, be a big girl

2008-06-14T22:55:00.000-05:00

A friend and I have been bantering back and forth about the campaign. She's a diehard political junkie and when we listened to the hopefully last Hillary speech, we couldn't take it any longer.

We had to set the record straight.*

She was so maddeningly disingenuous in her farewell address and throughout the campaign, that I found myself texting and instant messaging my friend to help me make sense of Hillary's screwball universe.

Irked does not even begin to describe the level of disgust I felt, as she held forth about 18 million cracks in the ceiling and other code words for sexism. It's like I told my friend, Hillary makes me want to spit!

The bowing-out speech, delivered fittingly in black funeral attire, underscored all the reasons why this otherwise intelligent and capable woman was so undeserving of the Democratic Party nomination.

She had a hard time just leveling with people, a hard time being honest with herself. ('I won the popular vote, therefore I won't concede. On second thought, I will concede, but those 18 million votes I won should still count.' Just say you lost and move on already.)

It bothers me that she's such a sore loser. ('If you don't pick me for VP, me and my posse of 18 million are gonna twist your arm and make you choose me, or else it'll cost you in the general election.') She let pride and ego get in the way of what could have been a dignified defeat.

I was aghast at how her camp stirred up the fury of Hillary's supporters over four measly super delegate votes that wouldn't have made much of a difference in the final outcome anyway; her team left out the fact that she netted 20 super votes in that special DNC panel meeting. And now after instigating the fight, she wants to play referee between her angry voters and Barack? She couldn't even tame her audience of supporters who jeered when she mentioned Barack's name in her final speech.

More than anything, though, I hate how Hillary's a feminist only when it's convenient.

You didn't lose because you're a woman.

You didn't lose because the rules were unfair.

You didn't lose because of Florida and Michigan.

You lost because we don't want you to be our next president. Why can't you accept that? You played the game and you lost fair and square.

Stop pouting.

Stop trying to make yourself feel better.

Stop reframing this to make yourself look like the victim who was robbed.

Set an example for Chelsea.

Be a big girl.

*My friend wanted to remain anonymous in this post but we wrote this post together.

Dodge slip n slide commercial

2008-06-11T23:15:00.000-05:00

They filmed this commercial right outside our building a few weeks before we moved from downtown LA. It was cool to see the hill on 4th street converted into a giant slip n slide.

This is amazing!

2008-06-10T23:25:00.000-05:00

Okay. Where have I been? I didn't even know this telescope imagery existed. You gotta watch this video. It's cool.

Direct TV

2008-06-07T23:28:00.000-05:00

We cut off our cable and now have direct tv, meaning, tv directly from the airwaves. ha ha. That's Ben's joke of the day. Anyway, we bought a $20 antenna and were shocked that we have more than 60 channels including about 40 digital stations! We are both mad at ourselves for having wasted so much money every month paying to watch TV. I guess we didn't realize how much free TV has evolved. We were still assuming that we'd get the fuzzy network stations and two 3ABN stations that we could get sans-cable in Berrien Springs. Boy were we wrong! Watching CNN online is fine by us!

Bullet points to my younger self

2008-06-05T12:21:00.000-05:00

I'm reading a book, well, I'm simultaneously reading like 10 books right now, but one of the books I'm reading is If I'd Known Then: Women in Their 20s and 30s Write Letters to Their Younger Selves. It's mildly interesting, but the concept is intriguing. It got me thinking what I would tell my younger self. Though I doubt I'll make time to write a full letter, I thought I would at least jot down some bullet points and ask YOU, what 5 things would you tell your younger self?

Here are mine:

Don't live life trying to get it all together 'cause nobody, not any body has it all together. It's an unattainable goal.
Don't judge people too harshly from your first meeting. They will often prove to be some of the most eccentric, interesting people you'll ever meet. They will add richness and depth to your life. Be open.
Keep your nose in the Word. Trust me on this one.
Debt is not cute. Don't use the credit cards. Live within your means or you'll be cutting off the cable and penny pinching when you're 31 to save a buck. :-) There are so many things you're going to want to buy that later will mean nothing to you. Save and find frugal ways to make life interesting.
You're going to be a preacher's wife, but don't let that hem you in and don't let that scare you. Be you. By the way, he's a fabulous guy and together you'll have lots of laughs and enjoy a son who will change your life in ways you can't even imagine.

I can't wait to read yours!

Sit Down, Hillary

2008-06-04T03:55:00.000-05:00

Okay, in her speech tonite Hillary said to get on her website and suggest where her campaign should go from here. Of course, I went to HillaryClinton.com and instead of Standing With Hillary, as they suggest, I wrote this message:

"SIT DOWN, HILLARY. Get over yourself and lose the race graciously."

I invite you to do the same. What is her deal?!

At the risk of sounding sexist, I can't find another word to call her but a NAG! No, it's not persistence and determination, it's nag. Like when you cut a chicken's head off and the body keeps running in circles. Just die, already!

yum

2008-05-18T21:10:00.001-05:00

yum
Originally uploaded by McPryce.

I'm into making (or asking Ben to make) these shakes with protein powder. Tonya (my midwife) first ordered me to drink a protein shake a day when I started having my pregnancy complications last summer. Since then I've craved them. Possibly because they're so easy to make and drink and they're filling. The powder for this one makes it turn green.
The shakes aren't always super healthy--sometimes they have ice cream (organic) or soy ice cream or peanut butter or fake coffee or chocolate and sugar. It's a nice treat.

Ignoring

2008-05-18T19:11:00.000-05:00

I love this PSA. Just saw it and had to share.

Interview about the birth center

2008-05-16T15:42:00.001-05:00

Glad I got to share, but they spelled Maxton's name wrong.

Retail Therapy

2008-05-12T11:26:00.000-05:00

We're on a tight, tight, tight budget, but Ben's dad spent the night here last night and so I had to go buy a shower curtain (and hooks and liner) for the 2nd bathroom. I went into Bed, Bath & Beyond and stayed in there a little longer than anticipated browsing the aisles. I bought the shower essentials and some bins for Maxton's closet. It felt so good to spend money and to walk around the store looking at cute stuff.

Why does it give me a rush to see beautiful things? Why is it so satisfying to purchase and incorporate something new into my decor? I don't fully understand it. Any ideas?

Mommy image

2008-05-08T00:24:00.000-05:00

No matter what stage of life women are in, we're constantly told, in subtle and not so subtle ways that we need to look like this. That we should look like this. That if she can do it, at 31 (same age as me), 6 months after having her second child, then what the heck is *your* problem?

It's a mean message. I refuse to feel bad about my new post-baby body... no, let me rephrase that. I would like to change my post-baby look, BUT not because I am aiming to look like this. This will not be the gauge by which I will judge my progress. I refuse to play that game. Heck, I didn't look like this when I was 21! Who am I kidding!?

Furthermore, I can't stand the girl's politics or her personality and she uses Dreft. Why is this picture bugging me so?

Hillary makes me want to spit!

2008-03-26T23:31:00.000-05:00

If Hillary ends up stealing the nomination, I'm not voting. I'm totally unplugging. Hillary makes me want to spit. Why?

The whole Florida and Michigan thing
Suggesting that Barack could be her VP
Jeremiah Wright is still news
Acting like she's entitled
35 years of experience
Snipers in Bosnia
Bill

She's dirty. There's no other way to describe it. And how is it that she manages to make us all feel like there will be hell to pay if she loses?

Exposed

2008-03-20T09:31:00.000-05:00

A couple of thoughts on the Barack speech. I felt a little exposed, when Barack was trying to explain black anger. A little like when you explain to a non-black person what you're going to do when you're going to get your hair "done" (perm) or why you're not straightening it anymore.

This very transparency and honesty is what we need though, if we're going to make it out of this racial rut.

The story of Maxton's birth

2008-03-19T16:56:00.000-05:00

“Ben, Ben!” I called from the bathroom. “Ben!” It was 5:45 a.m. and I wanted to wake him up without being overly alarming. “Um…I think my water just broke.”

“But your stomach hasn’t dropped yet,” he said sleepily, hoping I would change my mind and he could go back to sleep.

I quickly called my midwife, then my OB. The OB said to go to the hospital to get checked out. I then stood in front of my closet…what to wear, what to wear. We joked around, naming all the reasons we weren’t quite ready for baby:

We don’t have a carseat!
I haven’t washed all of his clothes yet!
I haven’t packed my hospital bag yet.
The diaper service doesn’t start for 2 weeks!
I have to preach today!
Our baby shower is tomorrow!

None of that mattered. At 35 weeks and 7 days, Baby McPhaull was ready.

On our way to the hospital, I felt what I thought were contractions. “Oh, I this must be how they feel!” I was still in a light mood, knowing we had a long haul ahead. “You know, I’ve been having contractions for weeks. I just didn’t know what they were,” I said.
The nurse in triage confirmed that my water had broken and I had dilated 3-4 centimeters---enough that they weren’t sending me home and I would definitely be having a baby that day.

The OB came to check on me. He was dressed in a suit and obviously on his way to church. He seemed rushed, like he had to teach Sabbath School or something.
They transferred me to a room and I called Tonya, my midwife, who’d promised to be my doula. I told her I was fine for now and she didn’t need to rush over. Ben was helping me with my contractions and they really were just like menstrual cramps, no big deal.

“Let me know when you start feeling more than you want to,” said the nurse. “I DON’T WANT DRUGS,” I replied. “Well, it’s part of my job to let you know they’re available.” Yeah, whatever, I thought.

Then the nurses came to do an ultrasound to assess the position of the baby. It took 3 nurses to figure out that he was head down (duh, I told them that) and to convince each other to stop scanning the top of my abdomen looking for the head. Then they stood around and started discussing who would be my nurse because there was someone who needed to be sectioned right away.

“Honey, if you keep changing positions I can’t keep track of the baby’s heart rate.” I was hooked up to continuous external monitoring. I didn’t really care about her dumb monitoring. I was having a hard contraction and she wasn’t doing a thing to help me through it…except offer drugs, of course. The baby’s heart rate hadn’t shown any signs of trouble in weeks and I knew he was fine…and that the nursing staff would survive if they didn’t hear his heart for 3 minutes.
“Honey, you need to lay back, I can’t get a reading on his heart.” I ignored her.
“Listen, if you don’t let us monitor him, you’ll have to sign a consent form saying that it’s not our fault if something goes wrong.”

“Can we have a minute by ourselves please?” It was the nicest way I could think of to tell her to get out of my room. She huffed a little, ignored me and kept writing in her book and then left the room. Never saw her again until after labor. Maybe she decided to stay with her c-section patient afterall. When another nurse came in my room I politely told her that I didn’t want that nurse in my room anymore. She looked a little wide-eyed, but whatever. I couldn’t risk her funky attitude and lack of support stopping my labor.

“I need Tonya now,” I told Ben. I had progressed to 5-6 centimeters. Ben called Tonya and I was in and out of sleep interrupted by contractions.

Tonya arrived and helped me breathe. “Did y’all take my coaching class?” she asked. I had to laugh. We must not have been doing too well. Ben was sitting in the chair cramming for the big test --- reading Natural Childbirth: The Bradley Way. Tonya was great. I asked her if my Indian style sitting position was okay. She said, “You can labor any way you want, but sitting like that is not going to help you progress. It’s going to make this process longer.” I laid down.
As it turns out, I was pushing and clenching against the contractions. Tonya said I was going to be sore the next day from all the resistance I was putting forth. It’s so hard to let your body relax when you’re having surges of pain.

Tonya and Ben stayed by my side, keeping me focused with stern encouragement. Tonya said I was taking the contractions like a champ and the baby was sailing through them. They were coming one on top of each other and it was painful yes, but just like really bad menstrual cramps. It wasn’t a new feeling to me. When I told Tonya, she looked at me like I was crazy and said that my periods should lighten up after having had a baby.

When Dr. Wu arrived, he checked me and I had progressed considerably. He said I was 7-8 centimeters and should be fully dilated in the next 20 minutes.

The baby’s head was still cocked to the side, getting lodged near my pelvic bone. Dr. Wu must have mentioned Tonya that he wanted to use the vacuum extraction. She wanted to avoid that. Once I was fully dilated and ready to push she said she was going to help me, through pushing and positioning, to move the baby’s head in place. We tried it, but it didn’t work, his head didn’t turn.

The nurse was very nice and calm (she was like 7 months pregnant) but she wasn’t very attentive. I don’t know if it was because Tonya was there, but she obviously wasn’t there to coach me or help me along. I guess her job was just to chart. She did help me once, when Tonya stepped out to make a phone call. Yes, she did coach me through a contraction that one time.
Okay—so, now I’m pushing and it hurts like nothing I’ve ever experienced. I was pushing, but it’s like I wasn’t feeling any progress, just intense pressure. I guess I expected to feel progress, like when you’re having a bowel movement and you bear down and you feel like something is actually coming out. Well, I didn’t feel progress, but everyone there is encouraging you by telling you they can see the baby coming out.

Oh, and when I say everyone, I mean everyone. I was told that because I was less than 37 weeks, the NICU team was going to be in the room on standby to check the baby out and make sure that he was okay. When Dr. Wu announced that it was time to push, it was like the lights on a movie set came on and the whole cast descended on stage. I said, “What’s the big production.” I didn’t expect all the drama. I think there were about 10 people in the room at that time. Well, one nurse lady, I don’t know who she was, don’t know where she came from, but she decided to occupy the spot where Tonya had been and proceeded to start getting IN MY FACE coaching me through.

“Stop tensing up.” she was demanding. “Breathe out! Push!” I didn’t know who this chick was and I don’t like to take orders from people I don’t know. Granted she was saying the same things that Tonya was saying, but I don’t know where she came from or who she was and I wanted her out of my room. The next time she got all up in my face, I opened my eyes and said, “Shhhhhhh.”

That didn’t work ‘cause she did it again. It was like she was so anxious to get in on the action. I was annoyed. I said, “Tonya, there are too many people in this room.” They all got the hint ‘cause Dr. Wu motioned and she was gone.

Pushing was intense. I was grabbing on to the bed bars, pushing down on the stirrups, straining and screaming. When the baby crowned it was a serious burn. By that point I think I’d had enough. “I can’t do this anymore,” I said in defeat. “Yes, you can.” Everyone said in unison. I knew that I’d crossed the line. I was almost there.

Between contractions I remember feeling this incredibly good feeling, like I feel Great! It was weird. From intense pain to an intense good feeling. Weird. Anyway, right at the homestretch, I think I was getting impatient. All these people standing around, telling me what to do and I’m the only one working here! I yelled, “Get. Him. OOUUUUUUUUT.”
So much for the quiet, respectful birth that I envisioned!

Now I know why they push epidurals. They can’t have a hospital full of women yelling out in pain like that.

After about 40 minutes of pushing, his head came out. I opened my eyes and saw a cone head and puffy eyes. The next pushes were nothing in comparison. He was out and crying. Ben dutifully grabbed the camera and snapped some great photos while the NICU team checked him out.

Dr. Wu said I tore a bit and he would start stitching me up after delivering the placenta. I heard him order some Pit for me to deliver the placenta. I was like, “I don’t need that!” Tonya heard me and said, “Delina, the baby is out, relax.”

The cord was super long and I was surprised at how big and fat the placenta was. Incredible.
I was anxious to hold my baby. Ben was over there grinning and cheesing, taking pictures, texting, etc. and I wanted to hold my baby. I got stitched up and asked for him. I wanted to unbundle him and be able to see and touch more than just his face. “Did anyone check to make sure he had 10 fingers and 10 toes?” I asked. Tonya said that she had.

They wanted to give Maxton the Vitamin K shot and some other shot. I was like, “No.” Tonya suggested that he get that one because it would stop any brain bleeding he might have due to the hard labor. I trusted her and consented.
There was concern that his blood sugar was too low. They wanted to give him FORMULA!!! and/or glucose. I had to ask Tonya what she would do if I were at the Birth Center, she said she would just try the glucose first. I consented, but had to sign a waiver for the other stuff I didn’t want.

We wanted Tonya to do a LaBoyer bath on the baby. They gave Tonya a hard time about getting a pail for the LaBoyer bath and when the nurse (another one with an attitude) finally consented, Tonya had already left. We were able to call her back. She was still in the parking lot.
I was so annoyed at them calling Maxton a preemie. I’d always thought that he was 1 week ahead of schedule, but I went ahead with their calculations, figuring it didn’t really make a difference.
Maxton Miguel McPhaull, my “preemie”, weighed in at 6 lbs. 10.5 oz. and 21 inches. I remember they were all surprised at how big he was. We’d had an ultrasound at the perinatologist’s office the day before and he estimated the baby was 6 lbs. He was born at 2:23 p.m.

A couple of weeks before labor, Dr. Wu had told me that in his 30-something years of practice, he’d had only about 10 women deliver without epidural. I told him that I planned to be #11. When he sewing me up, I was like, “Dr. Wu! I did it! I’m number 11!”

I can’t find words to express how grateful I am to have had Tonya and Dr. Wu in charge. I know, without a doubt, that without them, I would have had a c-section. Dr. Wu is confident, calm and reassuring. I think he has God’s demeanor. Knowing my son’s heart condition and the fact that his head was cocked in a funny way, I know that any other doctor would have saved himself the risk and trouble of a vacuum, scared us with a worst-case scenario and sent me to the operating room. I know this in my heart. I am so grateful.

And Tonya, I don’t know what she told the nurses, but there was no interference from them after she got there. I was so glad to have her advocating on my behalf. She was worth every penny. Without her coaching and leadership, I don’t know how I would have handled the nurses. I was invaluable having someone I could trust there looking out for me.

Thoughts:

All that talk about keeping hydrated and drinking water, juice and ice… all that is nice, but while in labor I didn’t want to do anything as strenuous as swallowing. I’m kinda glad I had that IV keeping my uterus hydrated.

I’m also glad for bed pans. I just wasn’t trying to get out of bed to go to the bathroom. I know women want the freedom to walk around, bounce on birth balls and lay this way and that way, but I had no desire to do anything but lay in the bed.

I didn’t feel like WonderWoman after labor. I didn’t have the euphoric feeling that I could conquer anything in my life after having had an unmedicated labor. I’d read that women felt so empowered after giving birth and I didn’t feel one ounce of that. As a matter of fact, I remember saying, “Whew! I don’t ever have to do that again.”

My overwhelming thought when I think about the labor is not anything mushy or emotional, but simply THANK YOU, GOD. I feel like Thanksgiving came early for us this year. There are sooooooo many ways this story could have been tragic and different and it wasn’t. Thank you, God.

*Our original plan was to have the baby at Tonya’s birth center, but at 25 weeks, at a routine ultrasound, it was discovered that the baby had SVT and hydrops. The baby’s heartrate was at 280 and fluid around his heart and in his abdomen, a sign of heart failure. I was immediately admitted into the hospital where I stayed for 2 wks. I was put on medication for the remainder of my pregnancy, had regular EKGs and weekly ultrasounds. From one day to the next, I went from having an uncomplicated (not even morning sickness) healthy pregnancy to being high-risk. I could no longer deliver at the birth center because the baby had to be closely monitored during labor and evaluated as soon as he was born. At around 34 weeks the baby’s heartrate stabilized but I was still on the medication. Dr. Wu is Tonya’s backup doctor and he agreed to take me on as a patient (after going through two other OBs who were determined to cut me open). This is how I ended up at the hospital with Tonya by my side.

Barack Obama Kicked Butt Today

2008-03-18T19:55:00.000-05:00

In his speech today about race, Barack Obama kicked butt. He addressed the issues of race in the U.S., not in a soundbyte or official press release, but in a thoughtful and compelling way which reflected the depth and complexity of the issue. I'll like to see how it's treated in the media and what Hillary has to say about it. It's going to be ignorant, I'm sure.
Watch it.

TED's questions

2008-03-05T21:16:00.001-06:00

The TED conference just wrapped up and I was reading more about what went on, etc. I found it interesting that these where the questions that they explored this year:

Who are we?
What is our place in the universe?
What is life?
Is beauty truth?
Will evil prevail?
How can we change the world?
How do we create?
What's out there?
What will tomorrow bring?
What stirs us?
How dare we be optimistic?
And the point?

Can you answer these questions apart from God and not come up empty? Even if it sounds good and profound?

WIR: Dreams from My Father

2008-03-05T21:06:00.000-06:00

I'm only in the first chapter (after the preface and introduction) of Barack Obama's book, Dreams from My Father: A Story of Race and Inheritance and already I think the man should be president. He's such a great writer. I can't get over it. And because I've heard so much of his speaking, it's obvious that is his voice on those pages. Lovin' the writing.

Mocking Faith

2008-03-01T20:47:00.000-06:00

I have lots of issues with the local news stations in LA, not the least of which is how they mock faith. This is a prime example.

Perris Woman Celebrates 108 Birthday

Update: I've been told that this link doesn't work for several people. The gist of the story was this fiesty old lady who turned 108 years old. She talked about how her faith sustained her and keeps her alive and how she goes to church every Sunday (and how she didn't get remarried because she didn't want to kill a beating/cheating husband...something like that... she didn't have teeth so it was a little hard to understand her). So... at the end of the segment the reporter says that even though she is a woman of faith, that doesn't mean she doesn't like to have fun. Her favorite birthday was her 90th when her family rented a male stripper.

WIR: Family Driven Faith

2008-02-27T03:33:00.000-06:00

I just finished reading Family Driven Faith: Doing What It Takes to Raise Sons and Daughters Who Walk with God by Voddie Baucham, Jr.
If you have kids or plan to one day, please buy this book and devour it. There's an excerpt here to get you started. Then pray about what God wants you to do with this information and how it should change your family.

Thoughts:

I don't know what a multigenerational church service looks like. We don't have children's church, youth church, or nursery, yet I don't see that our church service meets the needs of all generations. How can it? I'd like to see what this intentional style of service is like. Next time I'm in Spring, Texas...
I'm encouraged and convicted to do daily family worship, even though my son is barely 6 months old. It's a great time to start this habit in our own family (even though we both grew up having family worship, it's been a challenge for us to have regular couples devotionals).
Arguably, much of what the author writes has been summed up before, yes, by EGW. He even quotes one of her contemporaries who writes in the same way she did. ("And yet, in this time of fearful peril, some who profess to be Christians have no family worship. They do not honor God in the home; they do not teach their children to love and fear Him." --Child Guidance) So, yes, growing up SDA, I've heard and experienced much of this before. At the same time, it's refreshing and inviting to have a real person in the 21st century who is really living it be an example and encourage me. He also explains many things that are very today (New Age movement, trends of 20s/30s leaving church, etc.)
I don't agree with his assessment on the Emerging Church movement and mega-church seeker-friendly methods. Everyone didn't grow up discipled and we have to employ ways to reach that segment too (so they can then disciple their kids).
His concepts are next level. It's definitely for Christians who are playing church, thinking that taking their children to church once a week or teaching SS is gonna cut it. It's a challenge to get serious about the spiritual disciplines in our own lives so we are able to do what it takes to raise up the next generation of Christians.
I was a little thrown off at first by his view, in this sermon and somewhat in the book, to have as many children as God will bless us with. I don't think it's my calling (or that of my womb) to make sure Christians don't die out. I still don't know what I think about the whole thing, but I like the idea of adopting children and discipling them. It's true though that we have an anti-child attitude and I'm being intentional about changing my words and thoughts on this. He's right. He's so right.
I love the way he's counter-culture. So much of what we aspire to and expect of ourselves has to do with the Jones' down the street or images we see in magazines and on TV. It doesn't have anything to do with what God wants. We want our kids and lives to look and sound "normal," to blend in (with secular culture, mostly), and what kind of goal is that, really?
A point that really struck me was his story about the son who grew up in church, youth group, etc. and when he left home for college ended up.... wait. I can't tell you the whole story. Read the book. It's a powerful example of how everyday we send messages to our kids about what's important and the role of God, by what we emphasize (jobs, sports, activities, education, church, clothes) and spend our time and money on.
Never before have I been convicted about not sending my kid(s) to public school. I grew up in public school (though probably the mildest form that exists) and I always thought it superior to the Christian school in town (and education-wise it was/is). I always thought that it was the parent's responsibility to instill Biblical principles and I didn't need to get that from school....I needed to get a good education from school. Plus, the Christian school kids in town weren't any more Christian than us Christian public school kids were, they just had the money to afford the school, basically. So that was my thinking before reading the book. Now, I'm more convinced than ever that I will be homeschooling. Why?

I don't want the government in charge of teaching my kid(s). That's all the argument I needed, really. Knowing how corrupt and self-serving our government is, I really didn't need another reason.
SDA schools do not have stellar academic reputations. I could shop around for another Christian school, but who wants to deal with the flak from my husband's employer? No thanks. It's not that deep, really.
Good luck finding a school that is intentional about teaching a Biblical worldview, and I don't just mean creation vs. evolution. I mean, teaching students how to see everything --- all of the media messages they get bombarded with daily --- through a Christian lens. It's media literacy and no one is doing it.
Discipling children is a parent's responsibility. There's not enough time in a day to undo 8 hours of madness.
I have too many friends who are teachers that tell me that my child will be better off being taught at home.
The kids I know (and remember from my day) in Christian schools are really no different than the ones I know/knew in public school. Maybe that says more about the parents than the schools. Either way, you can't argue with the fact that you can spot a homeschooled child a mile away. They're wired differently. Thank you Dorla, Sarah and Voddie for making homeschooling families look appealing (you really don't have to look like you just stepped off Little House on the Prairie).

Check out how normal they actually are:

What I'm reading = WIR

2008-02-27T03:18:00.000-06:00

I've been reading some thought-provoking books lately. There will be a series of posts about them. If you've read them, I'd love to hear your thoughts. If you haven't, I encourage you to pick them up at the library or order them on Amazon.

30 days of 30

2008-02-27T01:45:00.000-06:00

I have approximately 30 more days of being 30. It's funny how I was dreading 30 and now I'm wishing I could hang on to it a little longer! Right around my birthday I always feel like it's time for a new Delina. I get that New Year's Resolution motivation. Here's what I'm striving to accomplish before 31:

1. Purge my closet of everything I don't love or wear. I don't have the same body since giving birth. Let's just leave it at that.
2. Find a place to live that I love. Our lease is up. We need more space. I'm ready for a neighborhood vs. downtown living.
3. Get serious and active with Mvelopes. See Dave Ramsey post below for explanation.
4. Taxes. This is the first year we're doing pastor taxes. I gotta get everything organized for our friend to help us through this maze. And get organized so we can pay quarterly.
5. Accomplish one homemaking chore daily. Yeah, it's a low goal, but I have to start somewhere. Maxton is having fun in the sling while I cook....but he's getting heavier by the day.
6. Do sign language consistently with Maxton. I really can't wait for him to start communicating with us.
7. Make real progress on the media literacy curriculum. I'll explain when I'm done.
8. Write one chapter in a book that I shoulda written 3 years ago. I'll explain when I'm done with the chapter.
9. Blog daily (except on my Internet-free day). On any one of my blogs. I have like 4.
10. Comment on blogs. I love comments, but I rarely leave them even though I read several blogs daily.
11. Embark on a project with Ben.
12. Entertain once more before we move and start packing boxes.
13. Have food ready for Ben when he comes home from prayer meeting. Maxton! Get ready for the sling.
14. Pilates once a week. I read somewhere that you shouldn't worry about exercise while you're breastfeeding. I'm sure it's an old wives tale or something, but I'm believin' it 'cause I hate working out.
15. Take a walk twice a week. To enjoy the downtown experience while we have it.
16. Finish A Woman's Heart. It's gonna mean getting up at 5 a.m. 5 days a week.
17. Write a thank you letter to Beth Moore and the nurse at the hospital. Long overdue.
18. Write a proposal for Shepherdess Ministry in this conference. I need it and I bet others do too.
19. Cheer on the runners at the L.A. Marathon. It's this Sunday.
20. Finish the praying for my husband project that I did half way through December.
21. Write Voddie & Bridget Bauchaum. I have questions.
22. Host a game night.
23. Buy only the necessities. No books. No cookies.
24. Take down the Christmas tree. I have a good excuse! I still haven't gotten good photos of it! It's the only thing holding me up. Really.
25. Soak my feet. The foot spa just doesn't get enough use and Southern California weather has my feet looking like the desert.
26. Invite Lasean to the Farmer's Market. Only a few more weeks of the farmer's markets within walking distance.
27. No cheese. For Maxton's sake, I need to be vegan.
28. Take 30 good pictures.
29. Have an Internet-free day. I can do it!
30. Pray for my testy. Encourage her and not be so annoyed by her.

A sign

2008-02-27T01:36:00.000-06:00

A few weeks ago I got a book in the mail. It was addressed to my mom. I figured she'd ordered it and it hadn't arrived before she went back home after the Christmas/New Year holidays (she lives in Costa Rica).

I opened the package and it was Dave Ramsey's Total Money Makeover. I called my mom. She hadn't ordered the book. I checked the packing slip. Turns out they mailed the book to the wrong address. I contacted the shipper/seller. They told me to keep the book or donate it.

I took it as a sign to be more proactive about our finances. I'm pretty much done reading the book and it's been a great refresher course. We took a money seminar at Granger Community Church and it's all the stuff we learned. Unfortunately, it's not all the stuff that we're still practicing. Anyway, all this year I've been completely irresponsible about money. I haven't been spending, as much as I've completely resigned myself from taking an active role. I've let Ben handle EVERYTHING. So much for bi-monthly Family Board Meetings. Haven't even created my password to sign on to online banking. I can't go on like this. Ignorance has been bliss on the surface. Deep down I know I'm not doing myself any favors.

I'm taking the FREE Dave Ramsey book as a sign, before I get knocked over the head with something more jarring.

Dork!

2008-01-28T08:58:00.000-06:00

My high school math teacher told me never to call someone a dork. "Do you know what that word actually means?" he would say.

Okay, but this guy is just a dork... as in dumb, jerkish and idiotic. Another George W. in the making.

UPDATE: My brother asked me if I would vote for a Mormon. I told him that Mormon wasn't the issue. I wouldn't vote for a MORON.

Thirsty?

2007-11-29T13:02:00.002-06:00

Well, if you're thirsty go get some water with a splash of lemon, but if you want to indulge in some yummy drinks, check these out:

Before I got pregnant I was pretty good about drinking mostly water and not wasting calories on drinks. I've recently fallen in love with two relatively new drinks though. They're so yum and worth the calories.

One is Izze--sparkling fruit juices. These are so good, especially when you crave soda but don't want high fructose corn syrup. You can find Izze at Starbucks, Chipotle, Target and some grocery stores.

The other is First Blush, 100% premium grape juice. It's the best grape juice you'll ever have. It's at whole foods and it's pricey (about $4/bottle) so we drink a little bit at a time out of shot glasses. LOL

First Blush has no sugar added and comes in Cabernet, Chardonay, Merlot flavors.

And no, they're not organic.

But one other drink that I frequented while pregnant, was Odwalla. And yes, I know Coke owns them. The Vanilla Al'mondo soy shake got me through many days when I was out and about and starving and needed protein. It's mostly organic.

The funniest thing I've seen in a long time

2007-11-11T22:15:00.000-06:00

I still need to blog my birth story and a hundred other things that I want to write about, but I wanted to share this first:

It made me laugh and I hope it makes you laugh too.

Communication Course #1 - http://www.zefrank.com/punc/

I thought I was showing then...

2007-08-29T13:28:00.001-05:00

16 weeks
Originally uploaded by McPryce.

So when I originally took this picture at 16 wks, I really thought I was showing a belly. What was I thinking? I just looked bloated... I'm huge now! Today one of our church members said to me, "looks like you joined the basketball team!" Yeah, well....

Out with the old, in with the new - Part 3

2007-08-25T19:43:00.001-05:00

heels and flats
Originally uploaded by McPryce.

I wore the heels until the very last second...but I just couldn't do it anymore. Not only do I not have the energy to try to balance on these things, my foot started getting bigger and I couldn't comfortably put them on anymore. So, these are my new *stylish* flats that I wear to church. I'm trying hard not to look frumpy...
The shoes are one size larger than what I usually buy and really, I wish they would have had the Wide version. Who knew my feet would swell like this!

It seems like overnight, my feet stay swollen and my face is more round and new stretch marks are appearing. This pregnancy stuff is no joke!

Out with the old, in with the new - Part 2

2007-08-25T19:36:00.001-05:00

new ring
Originally uploaded by McPryce.

So we went to the mall the other day. Got my rings cleaned and inspected. Had a tough time taking them off and found it painful and near impossible to put them back on. So I shook hands with reality, stopped blocking the circulation in my finger and decided it was time to give them up. I didn't really know my fingers were swollen. The rings never hurt or felt tight. We quickly went to JCPenney and bought a $10 band in a bigger size. I told Ben that it was so I wouldn't look like the girl who got knocked up by the married man.

Out with the old, in with the new - Part 1

2007-08-25T19:31:00.001-05:00

the old pots
Originally uploaded by McPryce.

We loved our pots. They were great pots. They were our first pots as a married couple. Our generous friend bought them for us as a wedding gift. We loved our pots. But then Delina got organic and environmental and wanted new non-Teflon-coated pots...but they were pricey. And then we started noticing the Teflon wearing out on the edges. We found a sale. We bought new pots. We're getting used to not having a non-stick surface... you gotta pay more attention, for sure. I I hate to throw away good pots and have those Teflon chemicals seep in to the groundwater, but I shouldn't give away pots coated with a likely carcinogen, right? We found a recycling place to take them to. Maybe they can find life as something else.

UPDATE: 8/29 - Caroline wants us to send her our old pots. According to her estimates, her pots have about 40% of the Teflon coating scraping off. Should I send 'em to her?

My first parenting lesson

2007-07-23T18:04:00.000-05:00

I'm having my first real lesson in parenting this week. Lesson #1: It’s not about me, it’s about the baby. I pretty much already knew that, but didn’t fully grasp what it meant. No chocolate, no full-night’s sleep, shortness of breath, daily naps, gross prenatal vitamins and supplements, weight gain… I thought that was extent of my pregnancy sacrifices. Now the very real possibility that delivering this baby may require a c-section has taught me what that lesson #1 really means.

I know in my head that situations like mine are what c-sections are for. But it's still hard for me to accept that this is my reality. I was fully prepared and committed to pushing this baby out like a woman!

I'm so dead-set against c-sections. They’re so overused. I can't tell you how annoyed I've been at all the people I've met or run into who tell me they had a c-section. It's not their fault, but it kinda angers me to know they just turned their bodies over to the medical establishment like that. I still don't believe that a c-section is equal to a natural, vaginal, quiet, unmedicated respectful birth experience -- not for mom, not for baby, not for future babies. And here I am. Having to face the fact that a c-section is the best thing for my baby.

I've cried my little eyes out, multiple times about this one. And I don't expect those that think my whole tree-hugger, natural ways are crazy to understand. All I wanted to do was what was best for the baby physically and emotionally and now I'm at the mercy of an OB whom I've never met and whose birth philosophy I don't know and whom I suspect is going to build a worst case scenario and scare me into whatever is medically-legally best for him.

I'll admit, sometimes I fantasize about having the baby in the parking lot of the hospital...so I can have it the way I want to and still have the doctors see him right away. Yeah, I can be a looney toon.

The specialists tell me that if the baby's heartrate stabilizes (and stops skipping beats) then I should be able to have a vaginal birth (at the hospital), but if not then the heartrate will be too hard to monitor and I'll need to be sectioned. To me, that doesn't sound like much of an option. I refuse to go into the hospital and get set-up... strapped to the bed on a fetal heart monitor, not allowed to labor in peace for as long as I need, being asked every 3 minutes if I want an epidural, given pitocin ... basically being set-up for the c-section that they were planning all along. Then they'll create this huge "emergency" situation to get me into the operating room. And in the end I'll thank them profusely for their medical intervention and bow down to the men in white coats. I know how the story goes. I was in the hospital long enough to know the MO. I'm not going out like that.

So now I'm pretty much resigned to the c-section. It's taken everything I've got to get here (and I'm probably not fully there yet), but I'll do what I have to do to give my baby the best chance at life with a healthy heart. In the meantime, I can still create a birth plan for a c-section....no non-essential talking in the operating room, Ben stays with baby at all times, no formula, I'll bring my own diapers, no Hep. B vaccine...

I've still got some fight left in me.

Baby naming poll

2007-06-24T12:54:00.000-05:00

We're curious to hear your suggestions on what we should name our baby. The baby's gender is still a mystery, so you can suggest a name for a boy or a girl, but it must start with an "M."

Why I'm done with Oprah

2007-06-21T10:48:00.000-05:00

No, you didn't ask, but I'm telling you anyway. And no, I'm not trying to convince you to give up Oprah, but I hope you'll at least take a more critical look at what she's feeding.

First off, some background. I've always loved to hate Oprah ... for constantly interrupting her guests so she can say waht she wants to say, for being a marketing genius and constantly pushing products (and materialism in general) and then having shows where she chastises people for being in debt, for speaking about God in generic terms ... until 9/11 when she started calling the name of Jesus (it was shortlived), for being so self-absorbed, for saying that marriage is outdated, ... okay, I could go on for weeks. I've been watching and studying the woman since I was 10. It was where I first learned what a lesbian was.

(Mom comes home from work.)

Delina: "Mami, what's a lesbian?"

Mami: "Delina, what are you watching?"

So, what made me stop even attempting to watch her critically? What made me delete her ticket hotline number from the speed dial on my cell phone?

Earlier this year she started promoting The Secret. Not only did she promote the book, dvd and concept, which I know to be a cheap imitation of God and faith that is inspired by the Enemy, but she touted repeatedly how, "I've been saying this for years! I don't see what the big secret is." (paraphrasing) I honestly could not watch the whole show because I was getting the heebie-jeebies.

A few days later, I convinced myself that maybe it was just that one show and I could harmlessly watch her again. But that day the show was about speaking to the dead. She was acting all skeptical, but allowed a medium to prove the madness to her and the audience by communicating with a guest's dead relative. I watched about 5 minutes of the show. I got the heebie-jeebies.

Okay, so strike 3 (YES, sometimes I'm slow to learn) was a show about aging gracefully and one of her guests was saying how essential it is for older women to masturbate. Oprah was all intrigued, "Really?" Okay. Um. That was it for me. Seriously.

I got the message, Lord. I decided from that minute that I would no longer allow this woman and her unchallenged guests to daily speak into my life (wait, isn't that an Oprah phrase?) No more O magazine, O at Home, Oprah.com or interviews with Oprah or by Oprah. I'm done.

Ben can't believe it (I'm sure I've said I'm done before.) He says he's proud of me and totally shocked that she's no longer a part of our daily lives (even though now I'm home all day and have DVR and Oxygen for the first time). I can honestly say that my taste for all things Oprah is gone.

Again, this is not to judge anyone who still enjoys her daily dose of Oprah. But I know that God has asked me to silence that influential voice in my life so I can hear Him more clearly.

My hippie midwife

2007-06-21T10:35:00.001-05:00

My hippie midwife
Originally uploaded by McPryce.

Sometimes I wonder what in the world Ben and I are doing in Los Angeles. Nothing seems like it's been a good fit for us (especially the cost of living!) But anytime I start dreaming about gettin' the heck outta this state, I remember one reason I know I'm here... and that's my midwife.
People ask me all the time how I chose the birth center and how I found my midwife. And I honestly don't have a logical explanation of how I ended up there. I just credit God, really.
Tonya Brooks is great. She's the owner/director of the Natural Birth & Women's Center. She's a total 60s hippie who believes in quiet, respectful natural birth. She loves babies and has helped birth more than 6000 in 30 years. She's passionate about the money-driven conspiracy from most doctors, nurses and the drug companies against women, their bodies and future fertility. She's loaded with scientific knowledge, yet is compassionate and trusts her gut. She spends at least 45 minutes with us on every visit (Does your OB do that?) and I've grown to trust her advice. She's all pushing vitamins, good eating habits, arming yourself with knowledge and having the confidence to face birth like a woman. Even though her philosophy is not mainstream, she doesn't hesitate to use technology (and even drugs) as appropriate. She totally speaks my language. Love her and would recommend her to anyone. Oh, and she's a Texas-Ex! What more could a girl ask for?

I love being pregnant

2007-06-21T09:39:00.001-05:00

When I told my sister that I'm going to miss being pregnant, she shook her head and said, "I don't know who this person is that you're turning into." Maybe I am transforming into a new creature. I guess it is sorta strange for someone who never fantasized about motherhood to suddenly be completely in love with the whole experience. It's just too cool though. From early on, Ben and I have been reading books and watching little documentaries about pregnancy and how the baby forms. It's a miracle beyond words.

Since I haven't been sick or had any other complications, the whole experience has been enjoyable, from hearing the heartbeat to watching my belly expand and move (I'm trying not to freak out when I step on the scale...heck, I've gained this much weight before for no good reason.)

And there's nothing like feeling the baby kick and move and stretch inside your belly. The other day, Ben was kissing my belly and the baby kicked him in the mouth. So cool.

I know that I'm really going to miss being pregnant. I think it agrees with me.

Soap Opera Syndrome

2007-06-17T23:55:00.000-05:00

Do you ever feel like when everything is going great in your life and you're feeling really grateful and thankful and loved and secure that something is going to go horribly wrong? I catch myself having these doomsday thoughts all the time. I've decided to call it Soap Opera Syndrome 'cause in the soaps (which I no longer watch, in case you're wondering), when everything is going right in someones marriage, you know there's going to be an affair next month, or if someone is really happy about something, surely tragedy is about to strike. I know that I've picked up this fear from TV, mainly 15+ years of a steady diet of The Young & the Restless. Whenever I catch myself thinking these thoughts, I have to deliberately program my brain to instead remember that, God is in control, I'm not being setup or jinxed, I am not superstitious, fears are whispers from the Enemy and "God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them."

Do you find yourself having to reprogram your brain to think different thoughts?

What will our baby look like?

2007-06-15T20:42:00.001-05:00

Ben and I have been daydreaming about what our child will look like by comparing our baby pictures.

Unhappy cows

2007-05-11T09:57:00.001-05:00

In a previous post, I blogged about the happy cows grazing the grass next to the Pacific Ocean. Well, if you're still thinking that buying organic is a waste of money....here's a picture of why your non-organic milk and cheese is so cheap.

IMG_4764
Originally uploaded by McPryce.

Ironically, these dairy cows are hemmed up in these large cages, slopping in their feces mud and eating grain when there are acres and acres of lush green grass all around.
During our visit, I saw, first-hand, what I'd read about on Goveg.com: "Cows raised for their milk are repeatedly impregnated. Their babies are taken away so that humans can drink the milk intended for the calves."
Yep... here are the baby calves, housed on the other side of the dairy.

Here's more....
"After their calves are taken from them, mother cows are hooked up, several times a day, to machines that take the milk intended for their babies. Using genetic manipulation, powerful hormones, and intensive milking, factory farmers force cows to produce about 10 times as much milk as they naturally would. Animals are pumped full of bovine growth hormone (BGH), which contributes to painful inflammation of the udder known as “mastitis.” (BGH is used throughout the U.S., but has been banned in Europe and Canada because of concerns over human health and animal welfare.) According to the industry’s own figures, between 30 and 50 percent of dairy cows suffer from mastitis, an extremely painful condition."
(from http://www.goveg.com/factoryFarming_Cows_Dairy.asp)

Unfortunately, this photo was taken at the Andrews University dairy (where, incidentally, they've won several awards for milk production... hmmmm). You'd think that at an institution who is affiliated with the an organization that promotes healthy lifestyles, things would be different. You'd think...

I'm no animal-rights activist, but this is disgusting and it's certainly not what I want on my cereal, in my sandwhich or for dessert.

I got grass!

2007-05-11T09:28:00.001-05:00

barefoot and pregnant
Originally uploaded by McPryce.

During our recent trip to Berrien Springs (for Ben to march in graduation), I got to revel in grass. Wow! All my life I've taken grass for granted. In Michigan (and Texas and D.C.) grass on the median, on the shoulder of the highway, and of course, in your yard...just grass everywhere. Nice, green, lush grass. The kind that makes you want to ditch your shoes and feel the chilly blades tickle your toes.

More grass shots from our visit.

Belly @ 18 wks.

2007-05-11T09:05:00.001-05:00

Dalimama
Originally uploaded by Scrole.

If you didn't believe it before, you can believe it now!

I'm still feeling great and have energy. I'm consistenly feeling little thumps in my belly, like the little one is trying to get my attention. It's pretty cool (and no, it's not gas). Everyday it's a struggle to find something to wear... (but then again, wasn't it always?)

I need grass

2007-04-19T18:22:00.001-05:00

baby in the grass
Originally uploaded by McPryce.

Ever since I found out I was pregnant, I've had the desire to move. Okay, it's not like we have a choice, necessarily, since we live in a 1-bedroom. But the whole time all I've been thinking about is, "we need grass. My baby needs grass." I couldn't really explain this "need." I'm not thinking about the number of bedrooms, closet space, proximity to grocery stores, safety....all I can think about is grass. When we move, when our lease is up, we need grass. It certainly doesn't help that we live in a mid-rise downtown and most of the grass in the parks nearby has been peed on (or worse) by homeless people. It suddenly occured to me that my vision of my child basking in the sun, sitting on the grass stemmed from this photo of me. I guess in my subconscious this is what childhood looks like and I have this urgent desire to recreate it for my baby. Weird.

Happy Cows

2007-04-18T15:13:00.001-05:00

Happy Cows
Originally uploaded by McPryce.

If happy California cows make good cheese, I hope this is where my organic cheese comes from. Check out the prime ocean-front real estate where these lucky cows get to graze!

How do you mess up oatmeal?

2007-04-18T15:10:00.001-05:00

Oatmeal
Originally uploaded by McPryce.

In the last 3 weeks I tried to order oatmeal three times (We were staying at hotels, so I couldn't make my own.) All 3 times, the oatmeal was sooooooooo gross. I thought Marie Callender's restaurant would have been able to get it right, but no such luck. How exactly do you mess up oatmeal so it's too gross to eat? CORRECTION: I only had 2 batches of oatmeal 'cause the oatmeal at one of the hotels cost $6.95. It'll be a hot day in San Francisco before I pay $6.95 for a bowl of non-organic oatmeal.

30 came and went...

2007-04-18T14:33:00.001-05:00

and I didn't even blog about it.
I have discovered a new sense of freedom in the last few weeks... a freedom and a right to just be me and not feel like I have to fit anyone's mold. Okay, so maybe I was never really trying to fit anyone's mold. I guess it's just a freedom to not explain myself. At the same time, I'm beginning to feel more and more annoyed at others who try to impose on me their image of what and who they think I should be. I know it sounds like I'm talking in code....but I mostly mean the whole PW thing.
Can we make it a prerequisite that people have to get to know you before they have a right to tell you what to do, say and wear? Somedays, I just want to blurt out, "Um, I'm 30...."

Baby News!

2007-04-18T14:18:00.001-05:00

IMG_4303
Originally uploaded by McPryce.

In case you haven't heard, Ben and I are expecting a baby in October! We are really thinking it's a girl, and apparently, so is our friend Deidre who, upon hearing the news, quickly knitted us a pair of booties.
If you're wondering, yes, this was a total surprise to us. Having a baby wasn't on our radar at all. We'd just signed a 1-year lease on a 1-bedroom downtown apartment.... we totally weren't even thinking about the possibility. Our immediate reaction, though, was "Wow! Thank you, God." It truly is a miracle and an unexpected gift (the best kind, eh?).
We've been seeing our midwife since early February (she confirmed the pregnancy at 5-6 wks) and we signed a contract to have our baby at a birth center (where there are no drugs, doctors or beeping machines). It's been an amazing experience getting to know our midwife and having her guide us through this.
She's completely committed to natural childbirth and has said all the "right" things to let me know we're in the right place. She's also a Texas Ex. Can't go wrong with a Longhorn! Hook 'em.
We've had our first ultrasound and first trimester screening and everything looks great.
I'm taking all types of vitamins, eating healthy, starting to walk 20-minutes a day, reading, etc. I haven't had any morning sickness (big blessing). The only thing that's been bothering me is hearing people's birth horror stories (people share them freely). I know that people mean well, but I really need encouragement that I can do this without intervention. I don't need people to highten the fears that I naturally have already.
This is week 15 and in the last week I've started to feel like myself again. I really didn't realize how tired and sluggish I'd been the first trimester. The irony is the more I feel like myself, I'm looking less and less like myself. Whose body is this anyway?

Life in LA

2007-04-18T13:57:00.001-05:00

Clear skies in stockton
Originally uploaded by McPryce.

Things I love about living in LA
1. Sunshine. Eating alfresco in January, February and March! You can't beat it.
2. You can find cheap organic food here with no problem. A trip to Whole Foods still eats up your Whole Budget, but there are so many other alternatives, Trader Joes and Wild Oats, that we only buy at Whole Foods when we can't find what we want anywhere else.
3. The people here are laid back. I was pleasantly surprised at how easy-going and no-fuss, no-attitude people were. I was expecting the I'm important, I'm a star vibe that I remember.
4. It's kinda cool to see the tapings of movies and commericals right outside your window. It can get inconvenient sometimes, but it's still a neat experience. It's also cool to see your neighborhood on commercials all the time.
5. The ocean is close by. There's nothing more relaxing for me than to watch the waves. I love the ocean. It seems a little odd to call Lake Michigan a beach. What was I thinking?
6. The most amazing public library that I've ever had access to is 4 blocks from our apartment. It has virtually every book that I have listed on my Amazon Wishlist. I'll never buy a book again!

Things that are going to take getting used to
1. Traffic anytime, anywhere. There's no rhyme or reason. That's life.
2. Smog, haze, "marine layer" whatever you want to call it, it ain't pretty. We're learning to be thankful for the stuff most people take for granted. "Hey! It's a really clear day today! We can see the mountains!" Sometimes when you're driving around and you look at downtown, it looks like someone took an eraser to the skyline and you can see a faint outline of what you know is there. Sad. This city needs a shower.
3. This is Babylon. Nobody comes here. Not Beth Moore, not Women of Faith, not Martha Munizzi, not any Christian concerts, speakers, authors, bookstores, nothing.
4. Our church is old-school and conservative. Big shocker. Big adjustment.
5. High rent. I won't tell you how much we pay for our little apartment because you'll call me an idiot. Out here, though, there are not many options. You either join the rest of the idiots or you pitch a tent on Skid Row.
6. People here keep to themselves. There's no sense of community. You can live here for years and not make friends, so I hear. I really don't want that to be my experience.

What I miss the most is having friends around, so please come visit. We'll blow up the mattress for ya! :-)